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I think the idea that death is not the end, that your dog's just gone to live on the farm, is limiting. Thoughts like that prevent you from making the most of the time that you have.

Jimmy Carr

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Jimmy Carr
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 15
Comedian
Film Actor
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Writer
James Anthony Patrick Carr
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Limiting
Death
Farm
Ends
Farms
Ideas
Prevent
Live
Dog
Time
Thoughts
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Idea

More quotes by Jimmy Carr

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I was in love with the idea of being in love with a woman way before I was actually in love with one.
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A lady with a clipboard stopped me in the street the other day. She said, 'Can you spare a few minutes for cancer research?' I said, 'All right, but we won't get much done.'
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Remember to never answer a phone during sex, even if you hilariously answer with 'I can't talk now, I'm going into a tunnel'.
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Saying that you don't believe in magic but do believe in god is a bit like saying you don't have sex with dogs, except labradors.
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Once I was doing a sponsored walk. In the end I managed to raise so much money, I could afford a taxi.
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Put Smarties tubes on cats legs, make them walk like a robot.
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It had to be hammered home quite a bit because I didn't see any humour in my life at all.
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I think being successful in comedy is being funny and making jokes - anything beyond that is the icing on the cake.
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Yes, I have this crazy honk of a laugh.
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I may be middle class, but I'm hard. 'Al dente', you could say.
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I had a survey done on my house. 8 out of 10 people said they really rather liked it
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If I'm at home for the weekend - and that is almost never - I tend to get twitchy at about eight o'clock in the evening because my body clock is timed to go on stage. I don't know what to do with myself.
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I like to write a joke without any fat on it.The shorter the better. I cater for people with ADD, basically.
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But what's true about comedians is that we've all got a huge hole in our personality. In a room of 3,000 people, we're the one person facing in the opposite direction - yet we have this overwhelming desire to be liked.
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You go, well you can't joke about race. Well if you're from a different race and that's your experience of the world and you want to talk about that, then fine. Or you can't talk about disability, but disabled comics can talk about that.
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A surprising amount of my jokes sound very implausible but are true.
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All comedians are a bit attention-seeking and I'm no different. Anyone with the audacity to want to be listened to for an hour and a half must be.
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My girlfriend bought a cook book the other day called 'Cheap and easy vegetarian cooking'. Which is perfect for her, because not only is she vegetarian.
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I was a Christian. I didn't want to have sex before marriage, I was a bit uptight and not very self-confident. I was a virgin until I was 26.
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When people come over to my house for dinner, I always have a vegetarian option. They can make do, or they can **** off!
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