Quote

A lady with a clipboard stopped me in the street the other day. She said, 'Can you spare a few minutes for cancer research?' I said, 'All right, but we won't get much done.'

Jimmy Carr

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Jimmy Carr
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 15
Comedian
Film Actor
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Writer
James Anthony Patrick Carr
Streets
Clipboards
Humor
Spare
Minutes
Spares
Funny
Lady
Done
Stopped
Right
Cancer
Much
Street
Research

More quotes by Jimmy Carr

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I, of course, don't have an accent. This is just how things sound when they are pronounced properly.
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There was one time where I failed to perform sexually. My girlfriend said to me oh don't worry, it happens to a lot of guys. Ok, there are two things wrong with that. First of all who are these other guys?, and second of all if it's happening to more than one of us, don't you think it could be YOUR fault?
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Eighteen years since the Chernobyl disaster. Is it just me surprized? Still no superheroes!
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Boxers don't have sex before a fight. Do you know why that is? They don't fancy each other.
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A surprising amount of my jokes sound very implausible but are true.
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I don't see myself as offending people.
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When you eat a lot of spicy food, you can lose your taste. When I was in India last summer, I was listening to a lot of Michael Bolton.
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Jokes spread around the world and embed themselves in our shared culture the most resonant of them get lodged in the language in the same way as clichés or old wives' tales do.
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I was in love with the idea of being in love with a woman way before I was actually in love with one.
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Cats have nine lives. Makes them ideal for experimentation.
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British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children. Fair enough. Use an ashtray!
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I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought the obvious one was 'Shout For Help'.
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Remember to never answer a phone during sex, even if you hilariously answer with 'I can't talk now, I'm going into a tunnel'.
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It had to be hammered home quite a bit because I didn't see any humour in my life at all.
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All comedians are a bit attention-seeking and I'm no different. Anyone with the audacity to want to be listened to for an hour and a half must be.
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Viagra has instructions: 'Keep away from children' - what kind of man do you think I am?
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The bigger the audience, the better with comedy.
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You never want to be the grumpy guy, although I do have quite a grumpy face.
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A big girl once came up to me after a show and said I think you're fatist. I said No, no. I think you're fattest.
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Women were quite terrifying until I was older. I think that's partly down to confidence.
Jimmy Carr