Quote

They don't tend to feature the kind of vaginas I like in adult films. I tend to like a thick, heavy pussy - the kind of pussy that looks like it just smoked an exploding cartoon cigar.

Jim Norton

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Jim Norton
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: May 17
Comedian
Sports Commentator
Charlotte
North Carolina
Funny
Thick
Film
Adult
Vaginas
Looks
Features
Smoked
Kind
Heavy
Pussy
Like
Tend
Exploding
Adults
Cigar
Films
Feature
Humor
Cartoon

More quotes by Jim Norton

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My whole existence is spent just trying to not shove bad food in my fat face. It's like a constant struggle. I'll do really good for a while, and then I do bad, then I do really good.
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Apologies our cultural obsession with them isn't about actually being offended, or simply needing to hear, “I'm sorry.” It's not really about right or wrong. It's about wanting to throw a rock in the dark and hear something break.
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I'm embarrassed for us as a free society that we actually want people punished for saying things we don't like.
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For the record, I hate skiing... and if you get killed doing it, GOOD.
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No periods. If you sneeze, the carpet's ruined.
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Two men spit in their hands, help each other out, then laugh about it later. Just to be silly.
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There's a trench coat and a tragedy in your future.
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You look like a diabetic strip club owner.
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What's the name of the birth defect you have, trampled by a horse during the 2nd trimester?
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I couldn't get laid with a sitcom and a rifle.
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I should call myself four market Norton. I'm great in Boston and Cleveland. I do good in Phillie, New Jersey.
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I hope you have a miscarriage on a Walmart floor and have the baby's room already decorated.
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The funniest people I know always seem to be the ones surrounded by darkness. And that’s probably why they’re the funniest. The deeper the pit, the more humor you need to dig yourself out of it.
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God, I hope he dies the night before one of his kids get married.
Jim Norton
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I don't pull out because... it's not my problem.
Jim Norton
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That's an interesting accent you got there. Are you from stroke-victim?
Jim Norton
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I hope you slip in a puddle of AIDS and crack your head open
Jim Norton
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That looks like something out of the dumpster of planned parenthood.
Jim Norton
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While There may be power in forgiveness, there is even more power in lobbing a Molotov cocktail through someone's dining room window.
Jim Norton
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My job is to express who I am and what I hate about the country and what I love about it and what I hate about myself and what I love about myself and to make you laugh while I'm doing it.
Jim Norton