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Why is comedy the only form of the arts where people think they have to agree with or approve the content? You don't walk through a museum with a towel and throw it over paintings you don't like.

Jim Norton

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Jim Norton
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: May 17
Comedian
Sports Commentator
Charlotte
North Carolina
Comedy
Museums
Art
Arts
Form
Content
Think
Throw
Towel
Thinking
Agree
Towels
Like
Walk
Approve
People
Painting
Museum
Walks
Paintings

More quotes by Jim Norton

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I hope you slip in a puddle of AIDS and crack your head open
Jim Norton
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I couldn't get laid with a sitcom and a rifle.
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My job is to express who I am and what I hate about the country and what I love about it and what I hate about myself and what I love about myself and to make you laugh while I'm doing it.
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The funniest people I know always seem to be the ones surrounded by darkness. And that’s probably why they’re the funniest. The deeper the pit, the more humor you need to dig yourself out of it.
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That looks like something out of the dumpster of planned parenthood.
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They don't tend to feature the kind of vaginas I like in adult films. I tend to like a thick, heavy pussy - the kind of pussy that looks like it just smoked an exploding cartoon cigar.
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What's the name of the birth defect you have, trampled by a horse during the 2nd trimester?
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What a coincidence, they both go to College and I'm a rapist!
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Get a in clothes dryer with Magic Johnson and some razorblades.
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Two men spit in their hands, help each other out, then laugh about it later. Just to be silly.
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While There may be power in forgiveness, there is even more power in lobbing a Molotov cocktail through someone's dining room window.
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People are just self-centered-it's all about them. And we're telling people it's okay to be 'all about you' because you're a victim and it's not your fault. That's why society has gotten more and more belligerent and selfish.
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That's an interesting accent you got there. Are you from stroke-victim?
Jim Norton
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I don't pull out because... it's not my problem.
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There's a trench coat and a tragedy in your future.
Jim Norton
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No periods. If you sneeze, the carpet's ruined.
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Apologies our cultural obsession with them isn't about actually being offended, or simply needing to hear, “I'm sorry.” It's not really about right or wrong. It's about wanting to throw a rock in the dark and hear something break.
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You 50 year old one-breasted bag of meat. Just hang it up and be grateful some of your friends are still living.
Jim Norton
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You look like a diabetic strip club owner.
Jim Norton
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God, I hope he dies the night before one of his kids get married.
Jim Norton