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My childhood best friend is an anesthesiologist. It's the least amount of human interaction for a doctor. I don't think you can get that burned out on it.

Jim Gaffigan

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Jim Gaffigan
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: July 7
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Elgin
Illinois
James Christopher Gaffigan
Human
Burned
Humans
Doctor
Think
Doctors
Thinking
Childhood
Friend
Amount
Least
Best
Interaction

More quotes by Jim Gaffigan

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I spent most of my adult life essentially agnostic or an atheist.
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It's not as if ten years ago, we were like, 'I wish I could take low quality photos of my dessert.'
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Television's very much a writer's medium, as it probably should be, but if you're not the writer, then as the performer, you defer to that. It's just kind of how it's constructed. Is there some leeway? Yeah. But I also don't want to come across as a jerk.
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I'm a guy who comes from a small town in the Midwest. It's not in my nature to say the most explicit things in public.
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I've had plenty of friends tell me that their first time doing stand-up, they do well, and then they tank for a while after that. Kind of like the first time you do a drug, you're like, Huh! This is pretty darn good, and then you spend all your money trying to get the same high.
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If only opening a Vitamin Water could be classified as working out.
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When I started stand-up - and this is in the '90s - there was definitely people hadn't watched decades of Comedy Central, where people are really much more educated on stand-up comedy.
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Whenever one of my children says, 'Goodnight, Daddy,' I always think to myself, 'You don't mean that.
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When our bed is made, it's covered in 40 pillows-like we're stockpiling ammo for the global pillow fight.
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Don't get caught up in other people's expectations. Don't take anything for granted, either.
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I really don't care about birthdays. It's something where even as a kid, I never really felt comfortable when someone would sing to me.
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Deep frying a Twinkie makes it healthy, right?
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I'm a comedian, which is the opposite of a lifestyle that equips you to be a parent.
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Have you seen the bologna that has the olives in it? Who's that for? 'I like my bologna like a martini. With an olive.' 'I'll have the bologna sandwich - dirty.'
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I got up early because I wanted to. - Nobody
Jim Gaffigan
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Playing frisbee with a five year old is amazingly similar to chasing after a frisbee.
Jim Gaffigan
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You ever buy a book and not read it? You feel almost guilty having it up on a bookshelf. People are like, Hey, how's that book? I haven't read it. Oh, did you just buy it? I've had it since high school. Well, can I borrow it? No.
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Meredith Baxter Birney gets beaten by a rod, in the Lifetime Original, Rod.
Jim Gaffigan
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I do just want to do jokes. I don't want to be a divisive figure.
Jim Gaffigan
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Thanksgiving, you know - Thanksgiving - it's like we didn't even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is we overeat.
Jim Gaffigan