Quote

I really don't care about birthdays. It's something where even as a kid, I never really felt comfortable when someone would sing to me.

Jim Gaffigan

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Jim Gaffigan
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: July 7
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Elgin
Illinois
James Christopher Gaffigan
Someone
Care
Even
Something
Birthdays
Really
Sing
Never
Comfortable
Would
Felt
Kids

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Steakhouses sort of have this old-school nature to them they're like museums full of good food. It's fun hearing the waiter share his expertise on the different cuts of beef and how they're going to cut up your baked potato.
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It took me a long time to understand not to get caught up in other people's expectations. It really comes down to creative fulfillment. It took me a while to realize I don't want to just be on a show to be on a show.
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I do have some Catholic stuff that is done from the perspective of an ignorant Catholic. But other than that, topic-wise, there's nothing really filthy.
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I do want everyone to feel comfortable. That's why I'd like to talk to you about Jesus.
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How about those people who don't need sleep? What are they called again? Successful? What a bunch of dicks they are.
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Bacon is like the opposite of medicine. It's like, Take that, Lipitor.
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I'm a weirdo that goes on stage to make strangers laugh, but if I wasn't working, I would just want to be with my wife and kids. I don't even think I'd want to go out to dinner.
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I'm an eccentric, silly, observational guy, but I'm not gonna frighten off social conservatives.
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I think I grew up with the idea that God was a punishing being, constructed around rules.
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I would make sweet love to Don Rickles.
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Do you ever leave a message for somebody and the answering machine cuts you off, and you have to decide whether you should not call back, or call back and appear like a stalker? Hi. It's me again. I forgot to tell you that I'm going to kill you. Because I'm the freak who keeps calling and calling.
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It's like in most parts of America, where there was industry and there is no longer there is cynicism mixed with sarcasm and some optimism. That's how my background influenced my comedy.
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You ever get a postcard, you get so excited you don't even read it! Hey I got a - who cares.
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I think growing up in Indiana prepares anyone for a life in comedy. I do feel like there is a certain kind of self-effacing cynicism among all Hoosiers.
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I feel guilty if I'm not reading books, but I read scripts of movies or things that I know I'm committed to that I'm going to do the project. I tell myself, I'm going to read this script like six times, and I only read it the initial time.
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My goal in life is to be as happy as a studio audience.
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The real question is should we trust people who don't like cheese?
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What exactly are the ingredients of Ranch dressing? Mayo and disappointment?
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On MySpace ... the whole demographic of the stand-up comedy fan has changed. It's like an indie band thing. People think they've discovered you.
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Even when you hear about a comedian getting married, among comedians, we're always kind of like, what are they doing?
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