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I'd have to say Sunset Salsa. Nothing against Honey Lime, but it's for losers.
Jim Gaffigan
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Jim Gaffigan
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: July 7
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Elgin
Illinois
James Christopher Gaffigan
Loser
Sunset
Honey
Nothing
Lime
Limes
Salsa
Losers
More quotes by Jim Gaffigan
As an actor, you deal with so much rejection and humiliation. When the good things come around, you tend not to trust your instincts.
Jim Gaffigan
You could say that to the pope. I want to talk to you about Jesus. He'd be like, easy, freak.
Jim Gaffigan
I come from a very big family. Nine parents.
Jim Gaffigan
I'm a comedian, which is the opposite of a lifestyle that equips you to be a parent.
Jim Gaffigan
I do just want to do jokes. I don't want to be a divisive figure.
Jim Gaffigan
Bacon's the best, even the frying of bacon sounds like an applause.
Jim Gaffigan
I think the worst professional advice I received was this kind of unspoken message of sit back and wait your turn, or sit back and wait and let other people do things.
Jim Gaffigan
I'm not saying that McDonald's gift certificates caused the obesity epidemic, but in retrospect, the timing is kind of suspicious.
Jim Gaffigan
It's weird, I love acting and stand-up is a very unique, solitary thing where you are the writer, performer and director. But acting is incredibly rewarding, working and interacting with people to create funny moments. I can't imagine not doing acting or stand-up, I really enjoy both of them that much.
Jim Gaffigan
How did we get to the point where we're paying for bottled water? That must have been some weird marketing meeting over in France. Some French guy's sitting there, like, How dumb do I think the Americans are? I bet you we could sell those idiots water.
Jim Gaffigan
When you hear bacon cooking....that sizzling sound isn't the fat cooking....that's applause.
Jim Gaffigan
Babies and toddlers are mostly what I've been exposed to at this point. I'm hoping parenting just gets much easier after this. It does, right?
Jim Gaffigan
I feel guilty if I'm not reading books, but I read scripts of movies or things that I know I'm committed to that I'm going to do the project. I tell myself, I'm going to read this script like six times, and I only read it the initial time.
Jim Gaffigan
I believe that comedians do what they do, and then they get credit or criticism for doing it. There's nothing planned about this.
Jim Gaffigan
I don't want people to think I believe in God.
Jim Gaffigan
That's my private business. Besides, the perception is that people that believe in God are stupid.
Jim Gaffigan
Do you ever leave a message for somebody and the answering machine cuts you off, and you have to decide whether you should not call back, or call back and appear like a stalker? Hi. It's me again. I forgot to tell you that I'm going to kill you. Because I'm the freak who keeps calling and calling.
Jim Gaffigan
My childhood best friend is an anesthesiologist. It's the least amount of human interaction for a doctor. I don't think you can get that burned out on it.
Jim Gaffigan
Who was the first person to walk into a harbor and say, Whatever that horrible smell is I want to eat it
Jim Gaffigan
It's good to be back in New York. I have lived here ten years. I'm originally from Indiana. I know what most of you are thinking: Indiana: Mafia. But the fact of the matter is where I grew up there was something very similar to the Mafia: 4-H.
Jim Gaffigan