Quote

Babies, they learn how to walk and they are already trying to run away. You can't reach the doorknob, you only know us, think it through.

Jim Gaffigan

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Jim Gaffigan
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: July 7
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Elgin
Illinois
James Christopher Gaffigan
Think
Baby
Thinking
Walk
Already
Walks
Learn
Running
Doorknob
Away
Babies
Trying
Reach

More quotes by Jim Gaffigan

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I was watching the Animal Planet. Did you know that the male seahorse has the baby? Why don't they just call that one the female?
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Besides hot pockets keeps introducing new products every 10 minutes so I always have new stuff on the topic.
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Have you seen the bologna that has the olives in it? Who's that for? 'I like my bologna like a martini. With an olive.' 'I'll have the bologna sandwich - dirty.'
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Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?
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Holidays are also an opportunity for kids to unlearn every good habit they've learned during the rest of the year. They don't go to school. They get to stay up past their bedtime. They get candy and presents for doing nothing. Childhood utopia.
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The hardest part of the day is all the stuff after I open my eyes in the morning.
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Entertainers Of Faith, funnyman Jim Gaffigan isn't ashamed of his Catholicism. He's seen here leaving a New York comedy club with his Bible in hand.
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I didn't realize how much of a Hoosier or a Midwesterner I was until I moved to New York. It's weird - growing up in Indiana, I wanted to get out, and now I completely romanticize Indiana. It just seems like there's a greater focus on family back there, which I suppose is something that kind of stayed with me.
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Thanksgiving. It's like we didn't even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is, we overeat. 'Hey, how about at Thanksgiving we just eat a lot?' 'But we do that every day!' 'Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?'
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I don't want people to think I believe in God.
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I'm a comedian, which is the opposite of a lifestyle that equips you to be a parent.
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I'm much more interested in making people laugh than getting applause breaks.
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What was the idea behind Hot Pockets? Was there a marketing meeting somewhere, 'Hey I got an idea: How about we take a Pop-Tart and fill it with really nasty meat? You could cook it in a sleeve thing, and you could dunk it in the toilet.'
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Thanksgiving, you know - Thanksgiving - it's like we didn't even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is we overeat.
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I didn't choose to be the guy who talks about the mundane - it's just who I am and it's what kind of works for me.
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I'm bald, blind and pale. I'm like a gigantic recessive gene.
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I think I have a lot of voices in my head and I guess my inner critic is a female.
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I've never eaten a Hot Pocket and then afterwards been, I'm glad I ate that. I'm always like, I'm gonna die.
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On MySpace ... the whole demographic of the stand-up comedy fan has changed. It's like an indie band thing. People think they've discovered you.
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I always seem to be chosen to do very flattering things like the beard comb over or go to the bathroom with the door open on Sex and the City or be the guy people meow at in Super Troopers. It's great for self esteem.
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