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I'm much more interested in making people laugh than getting applause breaks.
Jim Gaffigan
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Jim Gaffigan
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: July 7
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Elgin
Illinois
James Christopher Gaffigan
Much
Applause
People
Breaks
Laugh
Interested
Laughing
Break
Getting
Making
More quotes by Jim Gaffigan
I'm a guy who comes from a small town in the Midwest. It's not in my nature to say the most explicit things in public.
Jim Gaffigan
I curse in everyday life, but usually when I stub my toe. The topics I'm discussing, it's not necessary to curse. I found [cursing] is a sign that a joke is not finished or well-written.
Jim Gaffigan
I spend way too much time on Facebook and MySpace to feel too uncomfortable at this. I like to think of the Internet as an effective way to waste time and time.
Jim Gaffigan
I've always been somebody that it takes me longer to learn things, but once I learn them... I'm like a quarterback that plays best in the fourth quarter.
Jim Gaffigan
I usually don't have a burger, a brat, and a steak but it is 4th of July. And I need the energy if I'm gonna start blowin crap up. It's what the founding fathers would want.
Jim Gaffigan
My whole comic persona is that of a guy who explores the id: I romanticize gluttony, I romanticize laziness, and people identify with that.
Jim Gaffigan
Holidays are also an opportunity for kids to unlearn every good habit they've learned during the rest of the year. They don't go to school. They get to stay up past their bedtime. They get candy and presents for doing nothing. Childhood utopia.
Jim Gaffigan
I didn't choose to be the guy who talks about the mundane - it's just who I am and it's what kind of works for me.
Jim Gaffigan
You ever get a postcard, you get so excited you don't even read it! Hey I got a - who cares.
Jim Gaffigan
Is there a homeless guy built in to the design of Dunkin' Donuts? ...There'll be an entrance here... a deranged lunatic here.
Jim Gaffigan
My kids are so dramatically different, but it's not like I would trade one in or like there's one I would pick over the other ones. I know that sounds like I'm bullshitting. I also have five of them so I barely know them.
Jim Gaffigan
If I was on an airplane, the people in coach would know who I am. But no one in first class would know.
Jim Gaffigan
I do have some Catholic stuff that is done from the perspective of an ignorant Catholic. But other than that, topic-wise, there's nothing really filthy.
Jim Gaffigan
I worked on USA Today as a topic for while. I tried to do something on hand chairs, chairs that look like hands. I really tried. But some topics are not truly universal.
Jim Gaffigan
I feel guilty if I'm not reading books, but I read scripts of movies or things that I know I'm committed to that I'm going to do the project. I tell myself, I'm going to read this script like six times, and I only read it the initial time.
Jim Gaffigan
I was raised in a family where my father was the first one to go to college.
Jim Gaffigan
If only opening a Vitamin Water could be classified as working out.
Jim Gaffigan
I'd have to say Sunset Salsa. Nothing against Honey Lime, but it's for losers.
Jim Gaffigan
I smoke crack. I get all my dancers together and we do a prayer.
Jim Gaffigan
I had some jokes that were dirty. And some of it is when I started making appearances on Conan and Letterman back in the late '90s, I think. You had to remove the curse words, or you couldn't do some of the more explicit jokes.
Jim Gaffigan
