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It's like in most parts of America, where there was industry and there is no longer there is cynicism mixed with sarcasm and some optimism. That's how my background influenced my comedy.
Jim Gaffigan
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Jim Gaffigan
Age: 58
Born: 1966
Born: July 7
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Elgin
Illinois
James Christopher Gaffigan
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Industry
Sarcasm
Longer
Mixed
Comedy
Cynicism
America
Influenced
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Background
Optimism
More quotes by Jim Gaffigan
Kale is a superfood and it’s special power is tasting bad.
Jim Gaffigan
It's amazing how email has changed our lives. You ever get a handwritten letter in the mail today? 'What the? Has someone been kidnapped?'
Jim Gaffigan
Babies and toddlers are mostly what I've been exposed to at this point. I'm hoping parenting just gets much easier after this. It does, right?
Jim Gaffigan
Boutique hotels are great, but they get too cute. Some hotels have shoe polish. It's like, come on, this isn't 1960. No one's polishing their shoes.
Jim Gaffigan
I don't know about you, but when they first introduced bottled water, I thought it was so funny, I was like Bottled water! Haha, they're selling bottled water! ... I guess I'll try it. Ah, this is good, this is more watery than water. Yeah, this has got a water kick to it.
Jim Gaffigan
I didn't choose to be the guy who talks about the mundane - it's just who I am and it's what kind of works for me.
Jim Gaffigan
I love writing stand-up so much and tinkering and looking for ideas.
Jim Gaffigan
Now don't get me wrong, I love animals, but I like eatin' 'em more... fun to pet, better to chew.
Jim Gaffigan
Don't get caught up in other people's expectations. Don't take anything for granted, either.
Jim Gaffigan
I didn't realize how much of a Hoosier or a Midwesterner I was until I moved to New York. It's weird - growing up in Indiana, I wanted to get out, and now I completely romanticize Indiana. It just seems like there's a greater focus on family back there, which I suppose is something that kind of stayed with me.
Jim Gaffigan
For me, stand-up comedy is a conversation between me and the audience. I have to keep them listening. When I'm making jokes about cake for twenty minutes, I have to make sure my audience is interested and following where I'm going.
Jim Gaffigan
I only dated one Asian girl, but she was very Asian. She was a panda.
Jim Gaffigan
I don't want to get involved in the culture war. Religion's iffy.
Jim Gaffigan
Who was the first person to walk into a harbor and say, Whatever that horrible smell is I want to eat it
Jim Gaffigan
I just want to be known as funny.
Jim Gaffigan
I know that Colbert could quote Thomas Aquinas and all this, but I'm somebody who, because it's a necessity for me on a personal basis. I need it because I'm a lunatic.
Jim Gaffigan
If only opening a Vitamin Water could be classified as working out.
Jim Gaffigan
I went to a Catholic University and there's something about being a Catholic-American. You know, St. Patrick's Day is, I'm Irish-Catholic. There's alcoholism in my family. It's like I've got to be Catholic, right?
Jim Gaffigan
But in Indiana it's not like New York where everyone's like, 'We're from New York and we're the best' or 'We're from Texas and we like things big' it's more like 'We're from Indiana and we're gonna move.
Jim Gaffigan
Imagine you're drowning, and someone hands you a baby.
Jim Gaffigan
