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There is no spoon. I am completely spoonless over here.
Jim Butcher
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Jim Butcher
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: October 26
Actor
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Independence
Missouri
Spoons
Completely
Spoon
More quotes by Jim Butcher
Not that I was worried about anyone stealing my car. I once had a car thief offer to get me something better for a sweetheart rate.
Jim Butcher
It was never too late to learn something. The past is unalterable in any event. The future is the only thing we can change. Learning the lessons of the past is the only way to shape the present and the future.
Jim Butcher
Okay, Kincaid said. Anyone have any questions? Why do they sell hot dogs in packages of ten but hot dog buns in packages of eight?
Jim Butcher
The wacky thing about those bad guys is that you can't count on them to be obvious. They forget to wax their mustaches and goatees, leave their horns at home, send their black hats to the dry cleaner's. They're funny like that.
Jim Butcher
Love this job, Sanya murmured. Just love it. I need to challenge more people to duels, Thomas said in agreement. Men are pigs, Murphy said. Amen, said Molly. Lea gave me a prim look and said, I've not sacrificed a holy virgin in ages.
Jim Butcher
How long have you been a Wiccan?' 'A what?' 'A pagan. A witch.' 'I'm not a witch,' I said, glancing out the door. 'I'm a wizard.' Sanya frowned. 'What is the difference?' 'Wizard has a Z' He looked at me blankly. 'No one appreciates me.' I muttered.
Jim Butcher
Whenever it gets too dark, think of the good things you have, the good times you've had. It will help. I promise.
Jim Butcher
There is the world that should be and the world that is. We live in one and must create the other.
Jim Butcher
Sheep can befriend a hungry wolf only for briefly.
Jim Butcher
Tavi grinned. Are you with me? The plan is insane, Ehren said. YOU are insane. He looked around the inside of the tent. I'll need some pants.
Jim Butcher
I like dogs. They give Mister something to snack on.
Jim Butcher
Evil isn’t the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as Evil, maybe more so, and it’s a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against Stupid. That might actually make a difference.
Jim Butcher
I'm not a philosopher, Harry, [Michael] said. But here's something for you to think about, at least. What goes around comes around. And sometimes you get what's coming around. He paused for a moment, frowning faintly, pursing his lips. And sometimes you are what's coming around.
Jim Butcher
Sometimes it isn't easy to be sane, smart, and responsible. Sometimes it sucks. Sucks wang. Camel wang. But that doesn't turn wrong into right or stupid into smart.
Jim Butcher
Got to die of something, Giraldi observed. Might as well put back a few pints while you wait to see what it is.
Jim Butcher
Paranoid? Probably. But just because you're paranoid doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face.
Jim Butcher
Animals do not do what they have done. Animals kill to eat, to defend themselves or their own, and to protect their territory. Not for the joy of it. Not for the lust of it...Only humans do that, wizard.
Jim Butcher
And I knew that there was some dark corner of me that would enjoy using magic for killing—and then long for more. That was black magic, and it was easy to use. Easy and fun. Like Legos
Jim Butcher
Time after time, history demonstrates that when people don't want to believe something, they have enormous skills of ignoring it altogether.
Jim Butcher
Wizards and computers get along about as well as flamethrowers and libraries.
Jim Butcher