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Jump into an open grave? What kind of idiot are you? Butters replied. I might as well put on a red shirt and volunteer for the away team. There's snow and ice and slippery mud down there. That's like asking for an ironically broken neck.

Jim Butcher

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Jim Butcher
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: October 26
Actor
Author
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Independence
Missouri
Well
Red
Necks
Ironically
Kind
Asking
Jump
Slippery
Like
Broken
Ice
Mud
Team
Grave
Replied
Open
Shirts
Volunteer
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Neck
Wells
Idiot
Might
Snow
Shirt

More quotes by Jim Butcher

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You're a cop. I need a doughnut.
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I could buy that she would murder me in a fit of rage, poison me out of flaming jealousy, or bomb my car out of sheer, stubborn pique. But she would never do it and feel nothing.
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Laugh whenever you can. Keeps you from killing yourself when things are bad. That and vodka.
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Bob wasn't precisely a friend to me but... I was used to him. In a way he was family, the mouthy, annoying, irritable cousin who was always insulting you but who was definitely at Thanksgiving dinner. I had never considered the possibility that one day he might be something else.
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Any time I’m not shooting my mouth off to a clichéd, two-bit creature of the night like you, it’s because I’m up to something.
Jim Butcher
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Thomas has the kind of whiter-than-white boyish grin that makes women's panties spontaneously evaporate.
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Ignorance is more than bliss, it's freaking orgasmic ecstacy!
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Don't mess with a wizard when he's wizarding!
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...The next time I opened my eyes, I was in the morgue. This, all by itself, is enough to really ruin your day. I was lying on the examining table, and Butters, complete with his surgical gown and his tray of autopsy instruments, stood over me. 'I'm not dead!' I sputtered. 'I'm not dead!' - Harry Dresden, Death Masks, Jim Butcher
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Molly blinked, then looked at Thomas and said, Wait a minute.... We're his flunkies. You, may be, Thomas said, sneering. I'm his thug. I'm way higher than a flunky. You are high if you think I'm taking any orders from you, Molly said tartly.
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No story that juicy was going to stay secret for long.
Jim Butcher
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I'd been in hairier situations than this one. Actually, it's sort of depressing, thinking how many times I'd been in them. But if experience had taught me anything, it was this: No matter how screwed up things are, they can get a whole lot worse.
Jim Butcher
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Even in winter, the cold isn't always bitter, and not every day is cruel.
Jim Butcher
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Just remember that you're on my list, Marcone. Soon as I get done with all the other evils in this town, you won't be the lesser of them anymore. Marcone stared at me with half-lidded eyes and said, Eek.
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If your opponent has you by fifty pounds, winning a fight against him is a dubious proposition, at best. If your opponent has you by eight thousand and fifty pounds, you’ve left the realm of combat and enrolled yourself in Road-kill 101. Or possibly in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.
Jim Butcher
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Alone. It's one of those small words that means entirely too much. Like fear. Or trust.
Jim Butcher
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Star Trek?” I asked her. “Really?” “What?” she demanded, bending unnaturally black eyebrows together. “There are two kinds of people in the universe, Molly,” I said. “Star Trek fans and Star Wars fans. This is shocking.” She sniffed. “This is the post-nerd-closet world, Harry. It’s okay to like both.” “Blasphemy and lies,” I said.
Jim Butcher
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Sheep can befriend a hungry wolf only for briefly.
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There was a sound like a human yawn, and then the skull turned slightly toward me and asked, What's up, boss? Evil's afoot. Well, sure, Bob said, because it refuses to learn the metric system. Otherwise it'd be up to a meter by now.
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Sometimes I think that's where most of us are. Fighting off the crazy as best we can. Trying to become something better than we were. It's that second bit that's important.
Jim Butcher