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Men exist because a vibrator can't fix a flat tire. On second thought, I should just buy a AAA card.

Jill Shalvis

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Jill Shalvis
Age: 54
Author
Novelist
Writer
the United States of America
Second
Vibrator
Thought
Tire
Men
Card
Flat
Flats
Cards
Exist

More quotes by Jill Shalvis

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Go away. I hate everyone right now, and I'm pretty sure that includes you.
Jill Shalvis
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It’s frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
Jill Shalvis
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Sisters are the true friends who ask how you are, and then wait to hear the answer.
Jill Shalvis
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Experience is something you get… after you need it.
Jill Shalvis
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When I'm writing, the romance is always the most important thing to me, but I really love adding in slices of real life, and for me that real life always includes animals.
Jill Shalvis
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Who’s there?” “The scratcher of your itch,” he said. She opened the door a crack and stuck her nose out. “Was that supposed to be romantic?
Jill Shalvis
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Looking at him, she saw her future and felt all the ragged tears in her heart heal themselves. I fit, she whispered in marvel, stepping into him. I fit with you. He nodded and wrapped his arms around her. Perfectly.
Jill Shalvis
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She’s drunk dialing contractors ” Chloe said to Tara. “Someone should stop her.
Jill Shalvis
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Heat skittered through her belly, then directly south. “Sawyer.” In answer, he brought his head up and kissed her. Deep, hungry, tasting her in a purposely slow, thorough manner before pulling back to once again look into her eyes. Oh, God. “Sawyer, what are we doing?” she whispered. He shook his head. “No f#cking clue.
Jill Shalvis
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Today is the last day of some of your life. Don't waste it. quote from Tara Daniels
Jill Shalvis
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I’d want to have sex with myself. All the time.
Jill Shalvis
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Logan, why aren't you wearing protection? The radio crackled, and then came Logan's voice. I have 'protection' in my bag, he said. But as much as I don't want to say this, darlin', now's not the time to be asking if I'm carrying condoms. I have problems. A life vest, Logan! I'm asking where's your life vest! Oh, he said. I knew
Jill Shalvis
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The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.” – Chloe Traeger
Jill Shalvis
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He felt his heart roll, exposing its underbelly. Nothing he could do about that. He was equipped to eliminate threats, protect and serve. Not to love. Never to love.
Jill Shalvis
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Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with.
Jill Shalvis
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A thong. God bless the thong. He hooked his fingers in the silk sides and tugged, rolling the silk down her legs until it hit the floor, his favorite place for panties.
Jill Shalvis
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Oh my God, Maddie whispered, horrified. I rented him that boat. Does that make me a murderer? Tara's heart clutched. He's not dead yet. Hurry, Maddie called to Ford. I can't be the one who killed Tara's ex! I look terrible in orange!
Jill Shalvis
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He turned to shut and lock the door, then came close, his gaze touching her features. “I missed you, Holly.” Her heart caught painfully. The poor organ seemed to be getting quite the workout lately.
Jill Shalvis
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A small part of her secretly hoped she caught him in bed. But that really was a very small part. The bigger part hoped he was in the shower.
Jill Shalvis
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The calories in chocolate don't count because chocolate comes from the cocoa bean, and everyone knows that beans are good for you.
Jill Shalvis