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Men exist because a vibrator can't fix a flat tire. On second thought, I should just buy a AAA card.

Jill Shalvis

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Jill Shalvis
Age: 54
Author
Novelist
Writer
the United States of America
Card
Flat
Flats
Cards
Exist
Second
Thought
Vibrator
Men
Tire

More quotes by Jill Shalvis

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Who’s there?” “The scratcher of your itch,” he said. She opened the door a crack and stuck her nose out. “Was that supposed to be romantic?
Jill Shalvis
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Sisters are the true friends who ask how you are, and then wait to hear the answer.
Jill Shalvis
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She’s drunk dialing contractors ” Chloe said to Tara. “Someone should stop her.
Jill Shalvis
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Beneath her cheek, his heart was thumping steadily. Definitely faster than his usual near-hibernation beat. Lifting her head, she flashed him a tight smile. “I get to you.” “Are you kidding? You own me,” he said, his voice running over her like silk.
Jill Shalvis
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Oh my God, Maddie whispered, horrified. I rented him that boat. Does that make me a murderer? Tara's heart clutched. He's not dead yet. Hurry, Maddie called to Ford. I can't be the one who killed Tara's ex! I look terrible in orange!
Jill Shalvis
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He felt his heart roll, exposing its underbelly. Nothing he could do about that. He was equipped to eliminate threats, protect and serve. Not to love. Never to love.
Jill Shalvis
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Chloe? Yeah? I'd be worth the inhaler, he said, then forced himself to walk away.
Jill Shalvis
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I’m already yours. Always have been. All you have to do is step into the ring.
Jill Shalvis
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Chocolate is cheaper than therapy, and you don't need an appointment.
Jill Shalvis
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The smile made her want to hug him, and maybe love him up some more. Stupid smile.
Jill Shalvis
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If it’s going to be two against one, make sure you aren’t the one.
Jill Shalvis
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He can cook and give good massages. What more do you need in a husband?
Jill Shalvis
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A thong. God bless the thong. He hooked his fingers in the silk sides and tugged, rolling the silk down her legs until it hit the floor, his favorite place for panties.
Jill Shalvis
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They say money talks, but all mine ever says is 'good-bye sucker.
Jill Shalvis
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A conclusion is the place you get to when you’re tired of thinking.
Jill Shalvis
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Logan, why aren't you wearing protection? The radio crackled, and then came Logan's voice. I have 'protection' in my bag, he said. But as much as I don't want to say this, darlin', now's not the time to be asking if I'm carrying condoms. I have problems. A life vest, Logan! I'm asking where's your life vest! Oh, he said. I knew
Jill Shalvis
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Try asking sometime. Not all women will stand for that 50 Shades crap, you know.
Jill Shalvis
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A small part of her secretly hoped she caught him in bed. But that really was a very small part. The bigger part hoped he was in the shower.
Jill Shalvis
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If things don’t seem right, try going left.” – Chloe Traeger
Jill Shalvis
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Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with.
Jill Shalvis