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No encounter, mouth open up ... that is how the drug businesses see the general public.
Jerry Seinfeld
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Jerry Seinfeld
Age: 70
Born: 1954
Born: April 29
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Humorist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Jerome Allen Seinfeld
Cable Boy
Mr. Steinfeld
Jerome Allen Jerry Seinfeld
Mouths
Drug
General
Open
Public
Encounter
Businesses
Encounters
Mouth
More quotes by Jerry Seinfeld
Cry when you get a Golden Globe. Then you can get an Oscar nomination.
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A really hard laugh is like sex-one of the ultimate diversions of existence.
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Why does McDonald's have to count every burger that they sell? What is their ultimate goal? Do they want cows to surrender voluntarily?
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When you've been in the business 5-years, as a person, it's like you're 5-years old - like a child. 10-years and you're 10-years old, 20... Etcetera. That's how I measure maturity in this industry.
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And that's when I realized, when you're a kid you don't need a costume, you ARE superman.
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People have an infinite attention span if you are entertaining them.
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I think it's funny to be delicate with subjects that are explosive.
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I always did well on the essay questions. Just put everything you know on there, maybe you'll hit it.
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The peak of being a fan is a hotdog and a beer and a seat at the game. There's nothing above that. Nothing above it.
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Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.
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I think vacations are mostly completely stupid. Going to have coffee with a friend, you're probably going to have more fun than if you go to Aruba.
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Sometimes you can do certain things on stage, or even in a TV series, and people see the look on your face and they know what you mean, so you can get away with certain things. But if you can't create that look on an animated character, which is essentially a puppet, the line will hit the audience in a very bad way.
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You don't even really need a place. But you feel like you're doing something. That is what coffee is. And that is one of the geniuses of the new coffee culture.
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Sex to save the friendship? Well if we have to we have to.
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Sometimes they'll make little Play-Doh animals, and when they go to sleep, I'll break the heads off the animals and put them at the foot of their beds for them to discover in the morning. Nothing wrong with sending your kids a little Sicilian message.
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Fear of success is one of the new fears I've heard about lately. And I think its definitely a sign that we're running out of fears. A person suffering from fear of success is scraping the bottom of the fear barrel.
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To me, if life boils down to one thing, it's movement. To live is to keep moving.
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The truth is, the family is much more creatively nourishing because you're playing on a full keyboard. Whereas when you're single, you're just playing the upbeat jazzy tunes.
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The greatest thing about being a comedian is knowing other comedians. And you get to talk to them. Its the most fun.
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Somebody just gave me a shower radio. Thanks a lot. Do you really want music in the shower? I guess there's no better place to dance than a slick surface next to a glass door.
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