Quote

Have you ever noticed how they keep improving your laundry detergent, but they still can't get those blue flakes out? Why do we trust them to get our clothes clean? These guys can't even get the DETERGENT white!

Jerry Seinfeld

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Jerry Seinfeld
Age: 70
Born: 1954
Born: April 29
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Humorist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Jerome Allen Seinfeld
Cable Boy
Mr. Steinfeld
Jerome Allen Jerry Seinfeld
Even
Clothes
Detergent
Trust
Flakes
Guy
Laundry
White
Improving
Keep
Noticed
Stills
Clean
Still
Blue
Ever
Guys

More quotes by Jerry Seinfeld

Image
People on dates shouldn't even be allowed out in public.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
The blessing in life is when you find the torture you are comfortable with. That's marriage, it's kids, it's work, it's exercise. Find the torture you're comfortable with and you'll do well. You've mastered that, you've mastered life.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
The Beatles created something that never trailed off. What a gift that was to their fans. If you're into the Beatles, you loved them from beginning to end.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
This is really a crazy idea, you know. It probably won't work, but that will be interesting, too. You have to motivate yourself with challenges. That's how you know you're still alive. Once you start doing only what you've already proven you can do, you're on the road to death.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
I love meeting Israeli people. They look at me like a son
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
Men want to make women happy.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
I love advertising because I love lying.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
If airline seat cushions are such great flotation devices, why don't you ever see anyone take one to the beach?
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
On the side of box of my superman costume it actually said - 'Do not attempt to fly!'
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
Cry when you get a Golden Globe. Then you can get an Oscar nomination.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
Introducing 'Lite': the new way to spell 'Light' but with twenty per cent fewer letters.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
I am speechless: I have no speech
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
A chef who doesn't wash his hands is like a cop who steals. It's a cry for help.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
Then, finally, the third year, begging the parents, I got the Superman Halloween costume. Cardboard box, self-made top, mask included. Remember the rubber band on the back of that mask? That was a quality item there, wasn't it? That was good for about 10 seconds before it snapped out of that cheap little staple they put it in there with.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
The padded outfits, the bad scripts, the phony-looking sets... he dealt with it all. He had to. He was Superman.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
I love the day date. No wine, no shower.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
When men are growing up and they're reading about Batman, Spiderman, Superman ... those are not fantasies ... they're options.
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
I am freaking out! I am freaking out, man!
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
I'll tell you one of the great activities is skateboarding. To learn to do a skateboard trick, how many times do you gotta get something wrong til you get it right? ...And you hurt yourself, and you learn to do that trick, now you got a life lesson. Every time I see those skateboard kids, I think 'those kids'll be alright.'
Jerry Seinfeld
Image
My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law.
Jerry Seinfeld