Quote

Isn't it weird that we drink milk, stuff designed to nourish baby cows? How did THAT happen? Did some cattleman once say, Oh, man, I can't wait till them calves are done so I can get ME a hit of that stuff.

Jerry Seinfeld

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Jerry Seinfeld
Age: 70
Born: 1954
Born: April 29
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Humorist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Jerome Allen Seinfeld
Cable Boy
Mr. Steinfeld
Jerome Allen Jerry Seinfeld
Drink
Nourish
Happen
Cows
Waiting
Milk
Stuff
Designed
Happens
Till
Done
Weird
Men
Wait
Baby
Calves

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Then, finally, the third year, begging the parents, I got the Superman Halloween costume. Cardboard box, self-made top, mask included. Remember the rubber band on the back of that mask? That was a quality item there, wasn't it? That was good for about 10 seconds before it snapped out of that cheap little staple they put it in there with.
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I love meeting Israeli people. They look at me like a son
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When you interrupt, you've stopped listening. People need to be heard.
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Twitter is good. Why say a lot to a few people when you can say virtually nothing to everyone?
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My wife is funny. And I dabble in it. So being funny is big around our house. But what's surprised me is my daughter can do an English accent. I don't know how she learned this.
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Cry when you get a Golden Globe. Then you can get an Oscar nomination.
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No encounter, mouth open up ... that is how the drug businesses see the general public.
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A chef who doesn't wash his hands is like a cop who steals. It's a cry for help.
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I wrote an article on a new Porsche for 'Automobile Magazine.' I knew the editor, and she asked me to write this article. So I'm more proud of that than anything.
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Being a good husband is like being a good stand-up comic - you need ten years before you can even call yourself a beginner.
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