Quote

Life is truly a ride. We're all strapped in and no one can stop it.... I think that the most you can hope for at the end of life is that your hair's messed, you're out of breath, and you didn't throw up.

Jerry Seinfeld

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Jerry Seinfeld
Age: 70
Born: 1954
Born: April 29
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Humorist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Jerome Allen Seinfeld
Cable Boy
Mr. Steinfeld
Jerome Allen Jerry Seinfeld
Thinking
Throw
Life
Truly
Hair
Stop
Strapped
Hope
Messed
Didn
Ride
Ends
Breath
Think
Breaths

More quotes by Jerry Seinfeld

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What I don't understand is how women can pour hot wax on their bodies, let it dry, then rip out every single hair by its root and still be scared of spiders.
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You know the message you're sending out to the world with these sweatpants? You're telling the world, 'I give up. I can't compete in normal society. I'm miserable, so I might as well be comfortable.
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It's like having... you know, your phone has a charger, right? It's like having a charger for your whole body and mind. That's what Transcendental Meditation is!
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My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law.
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You'll fold faster than Superman on laundry day
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There's more to life than making shallow, fairly obvious observations.
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Most people, you do a TV series, it ends three, four, five years later it's a relic.
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Golf is the ultimate avoidance activity for the dysfunctional dad. A game so nonsensically difficult, so pointless, so irrationally time consuming, the word golf itself can only stand for ‘Get Out, Leave Family.’
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Pay attention don't let life go by you. Fall in love with the back of your cereal box.
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You don't even really need a place. But you feel like you're doing something. That is what coffee is. And that is one of the geniuses of the new coffee culture.
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Introducing 'Lite': the new way to spell 'Light' but with twenty per cent fewer letters.
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Isn't it weird that we drink milk, stuff designed to nourish baby cows? How did THAT happen? Did some cattleman once say, Oh, man, I can't wait till them calves are done so I can get ME a hit of that stuff.
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Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.
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Why does McDonald's have to count every burger that they sell? What is their ultimate goal? Do they want cows to surrender voluntarily?
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We're all trying to get to the same island — whether you swim, fly, surf, or skydive, it doesn't matter. What matters is when the red light goes on.
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You know why dogs have no money? No pockets. 'Cause they see change on the street all the time and it's driving them crazy. When you're walking them, he is always looking up at you. There's a quarter....
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It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.
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Your blessing in life is when you find the torture you're comfortable with.
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I am freaking out! I am freaking out, man!
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No encounter, mouth open up ... that is how the drug businesses see the general public.
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