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Cassivelaunus had prepared the river for Caesar, by planting it full of stakes (and had, no doubt, put up a notice-board).

Jerome K. Jerome

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Jerome K. Jerome
Age: 67 †
Born: 1859
Born: August 25
Died: 1927
Died: June 16
Actor
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Writer
Walsall
West Midlands
Jerome Klapka Jerome
Jerome Klapta Jerome
Full
Stakes
Board
Boards
River
Notice
Rivers
Prepared
Planting
Doubt
Caesar

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There is no more thrilling sensation I know of than sailing. It comes as near to flying as man has got to yet - except in dreams.
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It is a most extraordinary thing, but I never read a patent medicine advertisement without being impelled to the conclusion that I am suffering from the particular disease therein dealt with in its most virulent form.
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The odour of Burgundy, and the smell of French sauces, and the sight of clean napkins and long loaves, knocked as a very welcome visitor at the door of our inner man.
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If you are foolish enough to be contented, don't show it, but grumble with the rest and if you can do with a little, ask for a great deal. Because if you don't you won't get any.
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If there is one person I do despise more than another, it is the man who does not think exactly the same on all topics as I do.
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Cultivate a sense of humour. From a humorous point of view this lunch is rather good.
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I saw a great Newfoundland dog the other day sitting in front of a mirror at the entrance to a shop in Regent's Circus, and examining himself with an amount of smug satisfaction that I have never seen equaled elsewhere outside a vestry meeting.
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Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need - a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends, worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you, a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear, and a little more than enough to drink for thirst is a dangerous thing.
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Cheese, like oil, makes too much of itself.
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I had walked into that reading-room a happy, healthy man. I crawled out a decrepit wreck.
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It is always the best policy to speak the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar.
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Five thousand people in one society might do something, but five thousand societies of one member each would be a holy trouble.
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I love the chill October days, when the brown leaves lie thick and sodden underneath your feet ... the evenings in late autumn time, when the white mist creeps across the fields, making it seem as though old Earth, feeling the night air cold to its poor bones, were drawing ghostly bedclothes round its withered limbs.
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People who have tried it, tell me that a clear conscience makes you very happy and contented but a full stomach does the business quite as well, and is cheaper, and more easily obtained.
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Love is too pure a light to burn long among the noisome gases that we breathe, but before it is choked out we may use it as a torch to ignite the cozy fire of affection.
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Love is woman's business,and in business we all lay aside our natural weaknesses.
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Too much of anything is a mistake, as the man said when his wife presented him with four new healthy children in one day. We should practice moderation in all matters.
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Truth and fact are old-fashioned and out-of-date, my friends, fit only for the dull and vulgar to live by. Appearance, not reality, is what the clever dog grasps at in these clever days. We spurn the dull-brown solid earth we build our lives and homes in the fair-seeming rainbow-land of shadow and chimera.
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Life is a thing to be lived, not spent to be faced, not ordered. Life is not a game of chess, the victory to the most knowing it is a game of cards, one's hand by skill to be made the best of.
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I don't know why it should be, I am sure but the sight of another man asleep in bed when I am up, maddens me.
Jerome K. Jerome