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All is vanity and everybody's vain. Women are terribly vain. So are men - more so, if possible.

Jerome K. Jerome

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Jerome K. Jerome
Age: 67 †
Born: 1859
Born: August 25
Died: 1927
Died: June 16
Actor
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Writer
Walsall
West Midlands
Jerome Klapka Jerome
Jerome Klapta Jerome
Everybody
Possible
Women
Men
Terribly
Vanity
Vain

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Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need - a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends, worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you, a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear, and a little more than enough to drink for thirst is a dangerous thing.
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We must not think of the things we could do with, but only of the things that we can't do without.
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He is very imprudent, a dog he never makes it his business to inquire whether you are in the right or the wrong, never asks whether you are rich or poor, silly or wise, sinner or saint. You are his pal. That is enough for him.
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Weather in towns is like a skylark in a counting-house-out of place and in the way.
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They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.
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A glass of wine often makes me a better man than hearing a sermon.
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It is only the first baby that takes up the whole of a woman's time.Five or six do not require nearly so much attention as one.
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I don't know why it should be, I am sure but the sight of another man asleep in bed when I am up, maddens me.
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Love is too pure a light to burn long among the noisome gases that we breathe, but before it is choked out we may use it as a torch to ignite the cozy fire of affection.
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People who have tried it, tell me that a clear conscience makes you very happy and contented but a full stomach does the business quite as well, and is cheaper, and more easily obtained.
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It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so.
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It is in our faults and failings, not in our virtues, that we touch one another and find sympathy. We differ widely enough in our nobler qualities. It is in our follies that we are at one.
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It is well we cannot see into the future. There are few boys of fourteen who would not feel ashamed of themselves at forty.
Jerome K. Jerome
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There is no fun in doing nothing when you have nothing to do. Wasting time is merely an occupation then, and a most exhausting one.
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Love is woman's business,and in business we all lay aside our natural weaknesses.
Jerome K. Jerome
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There may be a better land where bicycle saddles are made of rainbow, stuffed with cloud in this world the simplest thing is to get used to something hard.
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I plodded conscientiously through the twenty-six letters, and the only malady I could conclude I had not got was housemaid's knee.
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If you are foolish enough to be contented, don't show it, but grumble with the rest and if you can do with a little, ask for a great deal. Because if you don't you won't get any.
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Nature, always inartistic, takes pleasure in creating the impossible.
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A good woman's arms round a man's neck is a lifebelt thrown out to him from heaven.
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