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What the eye does not see, the stomach does not get upset over

Jerome K. Jerome

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Jerome K. Jerome
Age: 67 †
Born: 1859
Born: August 25
Died: 1927
Died: June 16
Actor
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Writer
Walsall
West Midlands
Jerome Klapka Jerome
Jerome Klapta Jerome
Stomach
Upset
Boat
Eye
Doe

More quotes by Jerome K. Jerome

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There are many families where the whole interest of life is centered upon the dog.
Jerome K. Jerome
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It is always the best policy to speak the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar.
Jerome K. Jerome
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A new life begins for us with every second. Let us go forward joyously to meet it. We must press on, whether we will or not, and we shall walk better with our eyes before us than with them ever cast behind.
Jerome K. Jerome
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I saw a great Newfoundland dog the other day sitting in front of a mirror at the entrance to a shop in Regent's Circus, and examining himself with an amount of smug satisfaction that I have never seen equaled elsewhere outside a vestry meeting.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Love is woman's business,and in business we all lay aside our natural weaknesses.
Jerome K. Jerome
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But who wants to be foretold the weather? It is bad enough when it comes, without our having the misery of knowing about it beforehand.
Jerome K. Jerome
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There is no more thrilling sensation I know of than sailing. It comes as near to flying as man has got to yet - except in dreams.
Jerome K. Jerome
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A glass of wine often makes me a better man than hearing a sermon.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Oh, give me back the good old days of fifty years ago,“ has been the cry ever since Adam's fifty-first birthday.
Jerome K. Jerome
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In the church is a memorial to Mrs. Sarah Hill, who bequeathed 1 pound annually, to be divided at Easter, between two boys and two girls who have never been undutiful to their parents who have never been known to swear or to tell untruths, to steal, or to break windows. Fancy giving up all that for five shillings a year! It is not worth it!
Jerome K. Jerome
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I could not conjure up one melancholy fancy upon a mutton chop and a glass of champagne.
Jerome K. Jerome
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It is a most extraordinary thing, but I never read a patent medicine advertisement without being impelled to the conclusion that I am suffering from the particular disease therein dealt with in its most virulent form.
Jerome K. Jerome
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I had walked into that reading-room a happy, healthy man. I crawled out a decrepit wreck.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Contented, unambitious people are all very well in their way. They form a neat, useful background for great portraits to be painted against, and they make a respectable, if not particularly intelligent, audience for the active spirits of the age to play before. I have not a word to say against contented people so long as they keep quiet.
Jerome K. Jerome
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I like cats.... When I meet a cat, I say, Poor Pussy! and stoop down and tickle the side of its head and the cat sticks up its tail in a rigid, cast-iron manner, arches its back, and wipes its nose up against my trousers and all is gentleness and peace.
Jerome K. Jerome
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There is no fun in doing nothing when you have nothing to do. Wasting time is merely an occupation then, and a most exhausting one.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need - a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends, worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you, a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear, and a little more than enough to drink for thirst is a dangerous thing.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Truth and fact are old-fashioned and out-of-date, my friends, fit only for the dull and vulgar to live by. Appearance, not reality, is what the clever dog grasps at in these clever days. We spurn the dull-brown solid earth we build our lives and homes in the fair-seeming rainbow-land of shadow and chimera.
Jerome K. Jerome
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The odour of Burgundy, and the smell of French sauces, and the sight of clean napkins and long loaves, knocked as a very welcome visitor at the door of our inner man.
Jerome K. Jerome
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We must not think of the things we could do with, but only of the things that we can't do without.
Jerome K. Jerome