Quote

I plodded conscientiously through the twenty-six letters, and the only malady I could conclude I had not got was housemaid's knee.

Jerome K. Jerome

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Jerome K. Jerome
Age: 67 †
Born: 1859
Born: August 25
Died: 1927
Died: June 16
Actor
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Writer
Walsall
West Midlands
Jerome Klapka Jerome
Jerome Klapta Jerome
Twenty
Twenties
Housemaid
Six
Housemaids
Letters
Conscientiously
Malady
Conclude
Knee
Knees

More quotes by Jerome K. Jerome

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I like cats.... When I meet a cat, I say, Poor Pussy! and stoop down and tickle the side of its head and the cat sticks up its tail in a rigid, cast-iron manner, arches its back, and wipes its nose up against my trousers and all is gentleness and peace.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Nature, always inartistic, takes pleasure in creating the impossible.
Jerome K. Jerome
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It is easy enough to say that poverty is no crime. No if it were men wouldn't be ashamed of it. It is a blunder, though, and is punished as such. A poor man is despised the whole world over.
Jerome K. Jerome
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A new life begins for us with every second. Let us go forward joyously to meet it. We must press on, whether we will or not, and we shall walk better with our eyes before us than with them ever cast behind.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Cassivelaunus had prepared the river for Caesar, by planting it full of stakes (and had, no doubt, put up a notice-board).
Jerome K. Jerome
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Seek out some retired and old-world spot, far from the madding crowd, and dream away a sunny week among its drowsy lanes - some half-forgotten nook, hidden away by the fairies, out of reach of the noisy world - some quaint-perched eyrie on the cliffs of Time, from whence the surging waves of the nineteenth century would sound far-off and faint.
Jerome K. Jerome
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I should never make anything of a fisherman. I had not got sufficient imagination
Jerome K. Jerome
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I like work it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
Jerome K. Jerome
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All is vanity and everybody's vain. Women are terribly vain. So are men - more so, if possible.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Love is woman's business,and in business we all lay aside our natural weaknesses.
Jerome K. Jerome
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I saw a great Newfoundland dog the other day sitting in front of a mirror at the entrance to a shop in Regent's Circus, and examining himself with an amount of smug satisfaction that I have never seen equaled elsewhere outside a vestry meeting.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Harris said, however, that the river would suit him to a T. I don't know what a T is (except a sixpenny one, which includes bread-and- butter and cake AD LIB., and is cheap at the price, if you haven't had any dinner). It seems to suit everybody, however, which is greatly to its credit.
Jerome K. Jerome
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I had walked into that reading-room a happy, healthy man. I crawled out a decrepit wreck.
Jerome K. Jerome
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But who wants to be foretold the weather? It is bad enough when it comes, without our having the misery of knowing about it beforehand.
Jerome K. Jerome
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In the church is a memorial to Mrs. Sarah Hill, who bequeathed 1 pound annually, to be divided at Easter, between two boys and two girls who have never been undutiful to their parents who have never been known to swear or to tell untruths, to steal, or to break windows. Fancy giving up all that for five shillings a year! It is not worth it!
Jerome K. Jerome
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It is very strange, this domination of our intellect by our digestive organs. We cannot work, we cannot think, unless our stomach wills so. It dictates to us our emotions, our passions.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Cheese, like oil, makes too much of itself.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Five thousand people in one society might do something, but five thousand societies of one member each would be a holy trouble.
Jerome K. Jerome
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People who have tried it, tell me that a clear conscience makes you very happy and contented but a full stomach does the business quite as well, and is cheaper, and more easily obtained.
Jerome K. Jerome
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I often arrive at quite sensible ideas and judgements, on the spur of the moment. It is when I stop to think that I become foolish.
Jerome K. Jerome