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But who wants to be foretold the weather? It is bad enough when it comes, without our having the misery of knowing about it beforehand.

Jerome K. Jerome

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Jerome K. Jerome
Age: 67 †
Born: 1859
Born: August 25
Died: 1927
Died: June 16
Actor
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Writer
Walsall
West Midlands
Jerome Klapka Jerome
Jerome Klapta Jerome
Wants
Knowing
Comes
Without
Foretold
Enough
Beforehand
Weather
Misery

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Oh, give me back the good old days of fifty years ago,“ has been the cry ever since Adam's fifty-first birthday.
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It is always the best policy to speak the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar.
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We are but the veriest, sorriest slaves of our stomach. Reach not after morality and righteousness, my friends watch vigilantly your stomach, and diet it with care and judgment.
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When a man or woman loves to brood over a sorrow and takes care to keep it green in their memory, you may be sure it is no longer a pain to them.
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I saw a great Newfoundland dog the other day sitting in front of a mirror at the entrance to a shop in Regent's Circus, and examining himself with an amount of smug satisfaction that I have never seen equaled elsewhere outside a vestry meeting.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Contented, unambitious people are all very well in their way. They form a neat, useful background for great portraits to be painted against, and they make a respectable, if not particularly intelligent, audience for the active spirits of the age to play before. I have not a word to say against contented people so long as they keep quiet.
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It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so.
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Cassivelaunus had prepared the river for Caesar, by planting it full of stakes (and had, no doubt, put up a notice-board).
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Eat good dinners and drink good wine read good novels if you have the leisure and see good plays fall in love, if there is no reason why you should not fall in love but do not pore over influenza statistics.
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The shy man does have some slight revenge upon society for the torture it inflicts upon him. He is able, to a certain extent, to communicate his misery. He frightens other people as much as they frighten him. He acts like a damper upon the whole room, and the most jovial spirits become, in his presence, depressed and nervous.
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Opportunities flit by while we sit regretting the chances we have lost, and the happiness that comes to us we heed not, because of the happiness that is gone.
Jerome K. Jerome
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What the eye does not see, the stomach does not get upset over
Jerome K. Jerome
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They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.
Jerome K. Jerome
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All is vanity and everybody's vain. Women are terribly vain. So are men - more so, if possible.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Think of the man who first tried German sausage.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Being poor is a mere trifle. It is being known to be poor that is the sting.
Jerome K. Jerome
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Weather in towns is like a skylark in a counting-house-out of place and in the way.
Jerome K. Jerome
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If there is one person I do despise more than another, it is the man who does not think exactly the same on all topics as I do.
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If you are foolish enough to be contented, don't show it, but grumble with the rest and if you can do with a little, ask for a great deal. Because if you don't you won't get any.
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There is no more thrilling sensation I know of than sailing. It comes as near to flying as man has got to yet - except in dreams.
Jerome K. Jerome