Quote

If a football official were to call for a slow-motion replay every time Didier Drogba fell over, each match would last about six weeks.

Jeremy Clarkson

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Jeremy Clarkson
Age: 64
Born: 1960
Born: April 11
Broadcaster
Film Producer
Journalist
Television Presenter
Writer
Jeremy Charles Robert Clarkson
Every
Fell
Would
Slow
Time
Six
Replay
Football
Official
Week
Match
Call
Motion
Lasts
Officials
Last
Weeks

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Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.
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I'm having a nice cold pint and waiting for this to blow over.
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I'm not only in touch with my feminine side, I'm in touch with my gay side as well.
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Some say he never blinks, and that he roams around the woods at night foraging for wolves. All we know is he’s called the Stig.
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...it seemed appropriate that I should develop some kind of illness. This is a good idea when you are at a loose end because everything, up to and including herpes, is better than being bored.
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I dish the dirt out and I can take it. But why should my mother and children have to take it?
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I'd just find a story in Canada and come and do it. Combine harvester banger - actually I've done that: banger racing up in Red Deer [in Alberta, for his 1998 doc series Extreme Machines].
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I'm not capable of having an affair. You can ask my wife. I'm not physically capable.
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The newest Ferrari of them all, the 458, the Italia. The GT3 was good, but nowhen near as good as this... almost nothing on Earth is as good as this... Set that something I've just told, involving Cameron Diaz... and some honey... then it comes that even that isn't as good as this.
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I wore a groove in the kitchen floor with endless trips to the fridge, hoping against hope that I had somehow missed a plateful of cold sausages on the previous 4,000 excursions. Then, for no obvious reason, I decided to buy a footstool.
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I mean its a weekly occurrence that somebody will complain that Top Gear was on last night - and you just sit back and wait for the complaints. But if you start to pay attention to everyones concerns, you end up with something bland and boring. So you sort of have to ignore everybody in order to do the show how we want to do it.
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Ambition is a very dangerous thing because either you achieve it and your life ends prematurely, or you don't, in which case your life is a constant source of disappointment. You must never have ambition.
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Some say his droppings have been found as far north as York, and that he has a full size tattoo of his face, on his face. All we know is he’s called the Stig.
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If the Scottish want to break away, I shall stand on Hadrian's Wall with a teary handkerchief, and say: 'Good riddance to the lot of you, and take your stupid bagpipes with you.'
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When I was 16, I wanted to look like Lord Byron. It's not really a haircut so much as a hair-not-cut, but I've never changed it. It's a bit Byron, a bit Don Juan DeMarco and other things that I aspire to be.
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Do not cruise through red lights. Because if I'm coming the other way, I will run you down, for fun.
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Asking the front wheels of a car to do their normal job of steering while handling more than 170 is like asking a man to wire a plug while juggling. Penguins. While making love. To a beautiful woman while on fire, on stage. In front of the Queen. It's all going to go wrong.
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Sometimes I stagger even myself with my genius.
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I don't think I am particularly funny. In fact, I know I'm not.
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I love Alfa Romeos and that [Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio] was tremendous.
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