Quote

If a football official were to call for a slow-motion replay every time Didier Drogba fell over, each match would last about six weeks.

Jeremy Clarkson

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Jeremy Clarkson
Age: 64
Born: 1960
Born: April 11
Broadcaster
Film Producer
Journalist
Television Presenter
Writer
Jeremy Charles Robert Clarkson
Every
Fell
Would
Slow
Time
Six
Replay
Football
Official
Week
Match
Call
Motion
Lasts
Officials
Last
Weeks

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God may have created the world in six days, but while he was resting on the seventh, Beelzebub popped up and did this place.
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Like every big organisation these days, the BBC is obsessed with the wellbeing of those who set foot on its premises. Studios must display warning notices if there is real glass on the set, and the other day I was presented with a booklet explaining how to use a door. I am not kidding.
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I'm not only in touch with my feminine side, I'm in touch with my gay side as well.
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I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?
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Some say that he has no understanding of clouds, and that his ear wax tastes like Turkish Delight. All we know is he’s called the Stig.
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Being smarter than you look is better than looking smarter than you are.
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A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.
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Do not cruise through red lights. Because if I'm coming the other way, I will run you down, for fun.
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I love Alfa Romeos and that [Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio] was tremendous.
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The newest Ferrari of them all, the 458, the Italia. The GT3 was good, but nowhen near as good as this... almost nothing on Earth is as good as this... Set that something I've just told, involving Cameron Diaz... and some honey... then it comes that even that isn't as good as this.
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Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what BEING STABBED?
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I don't think I am particularly funny. In fact, I know I'm not.
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It's just thinking of funny things that will amuse us and entertain us and we'll come and do it.
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Italy's youngsters complain, apparently, about having to live at home until they are 72 but that's because they spend all their money on suits and coffee and Alfa Romeos rather than mortgages.
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.. international hand of freindship. A cigarette
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I'm having a nice cold pint and waiting for this to blow over.
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She can take a year to read something, whereas I like a book that becomes more important in my life that life itself. When I was in the middle of 'Red Storm Rising' by Tom Clancy - which was not selected for the Man Booker shortlist - you could have taken my liver out and fed it to the dog. And I wouldn't have noticed.
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Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.
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I wore a groove in the kitchen floor with endless trips to the fridge, hoping against hope that I had somehow missed a plateful of cold sausages on the previous 4,000 excursions. Then, for no obvious reason, I decided to buy a footstool.
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Some say he never blinks, and that he roams around the woods at night foraging for wolves. All we know is he’s called the Stig.
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