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This is perfect for India because everyone who comes here gets the trots.

Jeremy Clarkson

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Jeremy Clarkson
Age: 64
Born: 1960
Born: April 11
Broadcaster
Film Producer
Journalist
Television Presenter
Writer
Jeremy Charles Robert Clarkson
Trots
India
Gets
Perfect
Everyone
Comes

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I rang up Jay Kay, who's got one, and said: 'Can we borrow yours?' and he said, 'Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing.'
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Governments would rather spend their money on another bomber than education, and why do we fear black men when every bit of suffering in our lives has a Caucasian face attached to it?
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I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?
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It's just thinking of funny things that will amuse us and entertain us and we'll come and do it.
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Sometimes I stagger even myself with my genius.
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Ambition is a very dangerous thing because either you achieve it and your life ends prematurely, or you don't, in which case your life is a constant source of disappointment. You must never have ambition.
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You know what, I distinctly remember my boat blew up and I was killed!
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That [Pagani] Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.
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Planet Earth thought it had £10. But it turns out we only had £2. Which means everyone must lose 80% of their wealth
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Nothing can prepare you for the yawning chasm of time that passes in Canada before the healthcare system actually does any healthcare.
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A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.
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I therefore have to use The Force. And weirdly, this doesn't work very well. I don't understand why, because on the last census, I put my religion down as Jedi Knight.
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Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sportscar in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.
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.. international hand of freindship. A cigarette
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When you've finished using a car, put the f***ing seat back, so humans can use it afterwards.
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There are many rules for the elderly in the Highway Code. I have one too, and here it is: get a bloody move on.
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I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.
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I dish the dirt out and I can take it. But why should my mother and children have to take it?
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I'm not capable of having an affair. You can ask my wife. I'm not physically capable.
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Some say he never blinks, and that he roams around the woods at night foraging for wolves. All we know is he’s called the Stig.
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