Quote

There are many rules for the elderly in the Highway Code. I have one too, and here it is: get a bloody move on.

Jeremy Clarkson

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Jeremy Clarkson
Age: 64
Born: 1960
Born: April 11
Broadcaster
Film Producer
Journalist
Television Presenter
Writer
Jeremy Charles Robert Clarkson
Highways
Bloody
Code
Rules
Move
Moving
Many
Highway
Elderly

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I rang up Jay Kay, who's got one, and said: 'Can we borrow yours?' and he said, 'Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing.'
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I'm not capable of having an affair. You can ask my wife. I'm not physically capable.
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Americans are good at herding Bison. The end.
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I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!
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Asking the front wheels of a car to do their normal job of steering while handling more than 170 is like asking a man to wire a plug while juggling. Penguins. While making love. To a beautiful woman while on fire, on stage. In front of the Queen. It's all going to go wrong.
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I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.
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You take out an injunction against somebody or some organisation and immediately news of that injunction and the people involved and the story behind the injunction is in a legal-free world on Twitter and the Internet. It's pointless.
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If the Scottish want to break away, I shall stand on Hadrian's Wall with a teary handkerchief, and say: 'Good riddance to the lot of you, and take your stupid bagpipes with you.'
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I think it's a good idea to tie Peter Mandelson to a van. Such an act would be cruel and barbaric and inhuman. But it would at least cheer everyone up a bit.
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We don't know how many people are watching The Grand Tour's - it's a closely guarded secret, we don't even know - the only thing we can do is make a program that we enjoy. And then hope that we're not so unusual that other people won't share our taste.
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You're a car, but most of all, what you are, what you've become, is a mate. And that's what makes a car special. That's what makes a car great. You start to think of it as a person. You start to love it.
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The newest Ferrari of them all, the 458, the Italia. The GT3 was good, but nowhen near as good as this... almost nothing on Earth is as good as this... Set that something I've just told, involving Cameron Diaz... and some honey... then it comes that even that isn't as good as this.
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In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled. Usually when one of their customers wrote to the factory complaining about how dead he was.
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Cows eat grass and silage. This is melting the ice caps and killing us all. So they need a new foodstuff: something that is rich in iron, calcium and natural goodness. Plainly they cannot eat meat so here is an idea to chew on. Why not feed them vegetarians?
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I wore a groove in the kitchen floor with endless trips to the fridge, hoping against hope that I had somehow missed a plateful of cold sausages on the previous 4,000 excursions. Then, for no obvious reason, I decided to buy a footstool.
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Governments would rather spend their money on another bomber than education, and why do we fear black men when every bit of suffering in our lives has a Caucasian face attached to it?
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That [Pagani] Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.
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Selling through the internet seems to be a very good idea. There are a million areas that we can go to.
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Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste. But you would, wouldn’t you?
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