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I'm sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.
Jeremy Clarkson
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Jeremy Clarkson
Age: 64
Born: 1960
Born: April 11
Broadcaster
Film Producer
Journalist
Television Presenter
Writer
Jeremy Charles Robert Clarkson
Sorry
Aston
Bits
Couch
Sleep
Couches
Like
Martin
Sleeping
Driving
Drive
Bed
More quotes by Jeremy Clarkson
If the Scottish want to break away, I shall stand on Hadrian's Wall with a teary handkerchief, and say: 'Good riddance to the lot of you, and take your stupid bagpipes with you.'
Jeremy Clarkson
Some say he never blinks, and that he roams around the woods at night foraging for wolves. All we know is he’s called the Stig.
Jeremy Clarkson
The public seems to have bought into this belief that life can, and should, be run without risk, that all accidents are avoidable, and that death is something that only happens to people who eat meat and smoke.
Jeremy Clarkson
Being smarter than you look is better than looking smarter than you are.
Jeremy Clarkson
A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.
Jeremy Clarkson
When I was 16, I wanted to look like Lord Byron. It's not really a haircut so much as a hair-not-cut, but I've never changed it. It's a bit Byron, a bit Don Juan DeMarco and other things that I aspire to be.
Jeremy Clarkson
Americans are good at herding Bison. The end.
Jeremy Clarkson
I'm not capable of having an affair. You can ask my wife. I'm not physically capable.
Jeremy Clarkson
Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste. But you would, wouldn’t you?
Jeremy Clarkson
Selling through the internet seems to be a very good idea. There are a million areas that we can go to.
Jeremy Clarkson
They are by far the worst drivers. They are spiteful, dithering, old and in the way. They should have their licences taken away.
Jeremy Clarkson
I'd just find a story in Canada and come and do it. Combine harvester banger - actually I've done that: banger racing up in Red Deer [in Alberta, for his 1998 doc series Extreme Machines].
Jeremy Clarkson
I wore a groove in the kitchen floor with endless trips to the fridge, hoping against hope that I had somehow missed a plateful of cold sausages on the previous 4,000 excursions. Then, for no obvious reason, I decided to buy a footstool.
Jeremy Clarkson
This is perfect for India because everyone who comes here gets the trots.
Jeremy Clarkson
You have city centre pubs where men go to meet girls, not realising that all girls in city centre pubs have thighs like tug boats and morals that would surprise a zoo animal.
Jeremy Clarkson
If a football official were to call for a slow-motion replay every time Didier Drogba fell over, each match would last about six weeks.
Jeremy Clarkson
I don't think I am particularly funny. In fact, I know I'm not.
Jeremy Clarkson
There are many rules for the elderly in the Highway Code. I have one too, and here it is: get a bloody move on.
Jeremy Clarkson
We don't know how many people are watching The Grand Tour's - it's a closely guarded secret, we don't even know - the only thing we can do is make a program that we enjoy. And then hope that we're not so unusual that other people won't share our taste.
Jeremy Clarkson
Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what BEING STABBED?
Jeremy Clarkson