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How was I supposed to know what's real and what's not? It feels like I'm the only one who doesn't know the difference.

Jenny Han

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Jenny Han
Age: 44
Born: 1980
Born: September 3
Novelist
Writer
Richmond
Virginia
Difference
Differences
Doesn
Feels
Real
Like
Supposed

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When boy likes you, you say no thank you. You don't kick him on the ground.
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It’s hard to throw away history. It was like you were throwing away a part of yourself.
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Sometimes questions can be more cruel than insults.
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It's scary how easy promises were broken.
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I think I see the difference now, between loving someone from afar and loving someone up close. When you see them up close, you see the real them, but they also get to see the real you.
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Do you think there's a difference? Between belonging with and belonging to?
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If love is like a possession, maybe my letters are like my exorcisms.
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You can't put being in love on a scale. Either you are or you aren't.
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But just because you bury something, that doesn't mean it stops existing. Those feelings, they'd been there all along. All that time. I had to face it.
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Would you rather live one perfect day over and over or live your life with no perfect days but just decent ones?
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Aching familiar in a way that made me wish I was still eight. Eight was before death or divorce or heartbreak. Eight was just eight. Hot dogs and peanut butter, mosquito bites and splinters, bikes and boogie boards. Tangled hair, sunburned shoulders, Judy Blume, in bed by nine thirty.
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There hadn’t been one specific moment. It was like gradualy waking up. You go from being asleep to the space between dreaming and awake and then into consciousness. It’s a slow process, but when you’re awake, there’s no mistaking it. There was no mistaking that it had been love.
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And no matter what you do or how hard you try, you can’t stop yourself from dreaming.
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Here's something else, something important: Love is not transactional. It is not a bank account, you don't always get what you put in. Sometimes you put in so much and get very little return on your investment, at least that you can see right away.
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Love is scary: it changes it can go away. That's the part of the risk. I don't want to be scared anymore.
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I wonder what it's like to have that much power over a boy. I don't think I'd want it - it's a lot of responsibility to hold a person's heart in your hands.
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Everything good, everything magical happens between the months of June and August. Winters are simply a time to count the weeks until the next summer
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An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. a burn for a burn. a life for a life. that's how all this got started. and that's how it's going to end.
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I knew it in my bones. That this time was it. I had finally made my choice, and so had he. He let me go. I was relieved, which I expected. What I didn't expect was to feel so much grief.
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For me there was-is-nothing better than walking on the beach late at night. It feels like you could walk forever, like the whole night is yours and so is the ocean. When you walk on the beach at night, you can say things you can't say in real life. In the dark you can feel really close to a person. You can say whatever you want.
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