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I wish I had a boyfriend. I wish he lived in the wardrobe on a coat hanger. Whenever I wanted, I could get him out and he'd look at me the way boys do in films, as if I'm beautiful.
Jenny Downham
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Jenny Downham
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: January 1
Actor
Author
Film Actor
Novelist
Writer
Inner and Outer London
Boys
Hangers
Wish
Coat
Film
Wardrobe
Beautiful
Coats
Wanted
Boyfriend
Look
Whenever
Looks
Films
Way
Lived
Hanger
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Every seven years our bodies change, every cell. Every seven years, we disappear.
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You changed the rules of the universe when you fell in love with the enemy.
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It's as if a child with a brush and too much enthusiasm has been set free with a tin of black paint inside me.
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I can see inside planes!' he yells. 'Come and look!' It's difficult climbing in a mini dress...I haul myself up even though my arms ache. I want to see inside planes too. I want to watch the wind and catch birds in my fist.
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when I was four I almost fell down the shaft of a tin mine and when I was five the car rolled over on the motorway and when I was seven we went on holiday and the gas ring blew out in the caravan and nobody noticed I've been dying all my life
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The inside of the door is glossy white. A total re-paint. I touch it with my fingers, but it stays the same. It's so bright it makes the room waver at the edges. Every few years we disappear.
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Keep breathing. Just keep doing it. It's easy. In and out.
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Don't think you have to be good because you're the only one left. Be as bad as you like.
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I didn't understand that when you make love, you actually do MAKE love. Stir things. Affect each other. The breath that escapes from me is dazzled. He breathes it in with a gasp.
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Moments. All gathering towards this one.
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Hold my hand. Don't let go.
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It hurts and hurts to have him this close. I feel sick with it.
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I want you to be with me in the dark. To hold me. To keep loving me. To help me when I get scared. To come right to the edge and see what's there.
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I miss him as soon as he goes. When he isn't with me, I think I made him up.
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Parents don't know their children at all. No one knows anyone, in fact.
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. . . my bones they'll burn or bury. It'll be my death.
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Every few years we disappear, Zoey. All our cells are replaced by others. Not a single bit of me is the same as when I was last in this room.
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No, really. I free you.' I don't want to be free.
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Are you afraid, Tessa?
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I said I wouldn't leave her.
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