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There you go. Use your granddaughter to pick up women. That'll get you points in heaven.
Jennifer Rardin
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Jennifer Rardin
Age: 45 †
Born: 1965
Born: April 28
Died: 2010
Died: September 20
Author
Novelist
Writer
Evansville
Indiana
Use
Women
Granddaughter
Points
Pick
Picks
Heaven
More quotes by Jennifer Rardin
Hey, if you're going to price yourself, I say go high.
Jennifer Rardin
I'm sure it's nothing switching to a light beer won't cure.
Jennifer Rardin
We went to the door and I let Asha in. I expected an uberawkward moment when he and Vayl met. But Asha took care of that problem right away. So you belong to Jasmine, he said in his melancholy voice. It somehow delivered Vayl his deepest condolences without bearing a trace of malice toward me.
Jennifer Rardin
The girl in me wanted to slap Lung across his face and yell, Get your eyes off my sticky buns, ya creep!
Jennifer Rardin
Vayl, this is not a pleasant moment for me, I confessed. No? Locked in a windowless, doorless room with a dancing, headless corpse and a secret sucker that can move fast enought to tear us both a new one if I miss?
Jennifer Rardin
Cool! Now I can steal some rich old coot's Ferrari and go fishing for marlin with the same piece of jewelry.
Jennifer Rardin
When I bite you, it'll be because I want to make your toes curl and your hair stand on end. And you won't need stitches afterward. You'll need crutches.
Jennifer Rardin
Okay, okay, backing off. Um, I suppose this would be a bad time to ask you to talk to Pete for me, you know, about the car?' His eyes widened. I could almost hear him thinking, Of all the nerve! 'You were driving,' he said. 'But he likes you so much better than me.' 'That is because I do not keep wrecking the rentals.
Jennifer Rardin
Are you suggesting we pull a little good cop, bad cop scenario on him? And You're even letting me be the bad cop? He bowed his head. That, my pretera, is how much I love you. You have never been sexier than at this very moment. It is a shame we have so much company, he agreed quietly.
Jennifer Rardin
Unbelievable. After what just happened between us no, I don’t have any right. None at all. We’re barely a couple. We’re not even sleeping together. I have to- What in God’s name are you babbling about? You’re cheating on me! I never cheat.
Jennifer Rardin
Apparently you don't have to observe the Rules of Etiquette when reuniting with a muderous spouse.
Jennifer Rardin
I like these boots, I told Vayl. Do you think they'd sell them to me cheap? I keep ruining mine. Since when do you fret over money? he asked with amusement. I was not even sure you knew what to do with it. I shrugged. A women has needs. Still. said Cole. Gosh, Jaz, why didn't you say something to me? I'd never let you suffe
Jennifer Rardin
It looks as if I was thinking what you were thinking. Actually, you weren't. I was really thinking I needed to ask you a question. What was that? Do you think we should ask Goatee Guy how to find the caterer? I smiled at him innocently as his eyebrows pratically met above his nose. I am never going to share my pet peeves with you a
Jennifer Rardin
I’d smack you over the head with it so hard your bell would still be ringing for Church next Saturday night. ~ Jaz
Jennifer Rardin
Sounds good. Drive safe. He sighed, knowing I really meant, Take care of my Mercedes.
Jennifer Rardin
I described the pyramid we'd found and waited for him to jump on the bandwagon. Unfortunately he's afraid of wagons. And bands.
Jennifer Rardin
Cassandra,” he said, “I hope you know that poaching Muppets is illegal in this country.
Jennifer Rardin
All you can do is hang in there and hope you don't get motion sickness and puke all over the newspapers.
Jennifer Rardin