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You know who you remind me of? The kid cop in Lethal Weapon 3. You know, the one who says, 'it's my twenty-first birthday today', and right away you know he's dead meat?

Jennifer Crusie

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Jennifer Crusie
Age: 75
Born: 1949
Born: September 17
Author
Novelist
Writer
Wapakoneta
Ohio
Today
Meat
Firsts
Twenty
First
Twenties
Right
Weapons
Lethal
Dead
Cop
Says
Weapon
Away
Remind
Kids
Birthday

More quotes by Jennifer Crusie

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A lot of really big trees had died to make that desk. His mother had probably gnawed them down, used her nails to saw the boards, and finished the decorative cutwork with her tongue.
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she was just…beaming at me, and I thought she’d won the lottery or something, her smile was that big. I asked what happened, and she said…” Park swallowed again. “She said, ‘You’re here.”’ He blinked at Tess. “‘You’re here.’ That’s all it was. That big goofy smile just because I was there. Nobody ever smiled like that at me before.
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Where were all the women gamblers? It wasn't as if being a woman wasn't a huge risk all by itself. Twenty-eight percent of female homocide victims were killed by husbands or lovers. Which, come to think of it, was probably why there weren't any women gamblers. Living with men was enough of a gamble.
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As far as I'm concerned the last good man went when Elvis died.
Jennifer Crusie
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There wasn't enough gratitude in the world for a server who kept drinks coming at a time like this.
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That’s not a father. That’s a sperm donor. Forget him. He’s a mess. Concentrate on me. I’m terrific. (Linc Blaise)
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have you ever met a woman you wanted to give everything to? just turn over everything you had? -Davy Dempsey-
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Have you talked to North? he said. Yes, she said. I asked him to get us cable. I wish you weren't talking to him. I'd talk to Satan to get cable, Andie said.
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Dead woman are not romantic,' Sophie said flatly. 'Okay, she's not dead,' Phin said. 'The bear ate her, and she came her brains out.
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Christ, I'm in a Doris Day movie
Jennifer Crusie
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Look, I'm not ready for you, Min said. I'm not prepared. I don't have any defenses when you're around. I make these plans and I mean it, I really do, and then I kiss you because I'm crazy about you which would be fine if I didn't fall in love with you but there that is, just standing there, and you know it, you know you've got me.
Jennifer Crusie
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Well, you won't unless you come to lunch with me, Cal said. I'm holding it for ransom. There's a gun to its heel right now. I have lunch at my desk, Min began, and thought,Oh, for crying out loud, could I beany more pathetic ? Emilio is experimenting with a lunch menu. He needs you. I need you.
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Dempseys are never in trouble. We just have stretches of life that are more interesting than others.
Jennifer Crusie
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This is making me crazy. I hate relying on other people to save me, I hate being clingy, I hate it, and every time you show up, I lean on you. - Matilda Scarlet Veronica Betty Vilma Goodnight
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Very few people mate for life with the people they fall for at twelve. Doesn't mean is isn't real, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean it doesn't matter, but basically, we're talking a practice swing in the big game of love.
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A bar would not be a good career move for you.
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Can we go to work now? Because we're about a minute away from breaking out the ice cream and talking about our feelings, and I don't think we can come back from that.
Jennifer Crusie
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The measuring and mixing always smoothed out her thinking processes - nothing was as calming as creaming butter - and when the kitchen was warm from the oven overheating and the smell of baking chocolate, she took final stock of where she'd been and where she was going. Everything was fine.
Jennifer Crusie
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What i'm trying to tell you, Min said, is that im going to grow up to be one of those chubby old ladies. It's in my genes. Like self raising flour. i'm going to pouf. thats going to work out well for me, Cal said. because i'm going to grow up to be one of those horny old men who chases chubby old ladies around the couch.
Jennifer Crusie
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So I know you must have a plan and this wolf— Beast, Min said. —frog, whatever, can't fit your plan. He's not a frog, Min said. I kissed him and he did not turn into a prince.He turned into a god. No, he didn't . Look, I'm never going to see him again, so everybody can relax.
Jennifer Crusie