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You know who you remind me of? The kid cop in Lethal Weapon 3. You know, the one who says, 'it's my twenty-first birthday today', and right away you know he's dead meat?

Jennifer Crusie

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Jennifer Crusie
Age: 75
Born: 1949
Born: September 17
Author
Novelist
Writer
Wapakoneta
Ohio
Kids
Birthday
Today
Meat
Firsts
Twenty
First
Twenties
Right
Weapons
Lethal
Dead
Cop
Says
Weapon
Away
Remind

More quotes by Jennifer Crusie

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Drink to me! I just realized that I've slept with everyone at this table! ~Nell
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There wasn't enough gratitude in the world for a server who kept drinks coming at a time like this.
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It's a good thing he broke up with you because now you're free for when the right man finds you. Your prince is on his way. Right. I'm sure he was on his way but a truck hit him.
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Very few people mate for life with the people they fall for at twelve. Doesn't mean is isn't real, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean it doesn't matter, but basically, we're talking a practice swing in the big game of love.
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The measuring and mixing always smoothed out her thinking processes - nothing was as calming as creaming butter - and when the kitchen was warm from the oven overheating and the smell of baking chocolate, she took final stock of where she'd been and where she was going. Everything was fine.
Jennifer Crusie
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Once you know the truth, it's always obvious
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Breasts are very important for women. Their clothes just don't hang right without them.
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The last time I saw a brow that low I was watching slides in anthropology class
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she was just…beaming at me, and I thought she’d won the lottery or something, her smile was that big. I asked what happened, and she said…” Park swallowed again. “She said, ‘You’re here.”’ He blinked at Tess. “‘You’re here.’ That’s all it was. That big goofy smile just because I was there. Nobody ever smiled like that at me before.
Jennifer Crusie
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Nobody in my life has ever known me the way you do. Nobody in my life has ever made me feel as good as you do. You know me, you know everything about me, and when you leave me, you're going to be leaving the real me, the me nobody else has ever seen, that's who you're going to be rejecting.
Jennifer Crusie
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Be sober, be vigilant because your adversary the Devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.
Jennifer Crusie
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Where were all the women gamblers? It wasn't as if being a woman wasn't a huge risk all by itself. Twenty-eight percent of female homocide victims were killed by husbands or lovers. Which, come to think of it, was probably why there weren't any women gamblers. Living with men was enough of a gamble.
Jennifer Crusie
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Well, you won't unless you come to lunch with me, Cal said. I'm holding it for ransom. There's a gun to its heel right now. I have lunch at my desk, Min began, and thought,Oh, for crying out loud, could I beany more pathetic ? Emilio is experimenting with a lunch menu. He needs you. I need you.
Jennifer Crusie
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What i'm trying to tell you, Min said, is that im going to grow up to be one of those chubby old ladies. It's in my genes. Like self raising flour. i'm going to pouf. thats going to work out well for me, Cal said. because i'm going to grow up to be one of those horny old men who chases chubby old ladies around the couch.
Jennifer Crusie
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Feel no guilt. Getting married and giving birth does not mean that you have sold your life away to perfectly healthy people who can get their own damn socks.
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His sentences didn't seem to have any verbs, which was par for a politician. All nouns, no action.
Jennifer Crusie
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Phin spared a moment of sympathy for Frank until he looked back and saw him at the bar, leaning into Clea’s cleavage. Get a grip, Frank, he thought, and then he looked down Sophie’s dress and thought, Never mind, Frank.
Jennifer Crusie
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You’ve always been nuts. That’s fine. I can deal with nuts. But lately, you’ve been depressed nuts. I can’t deal with that. - Anthony
Jennifer Crusie
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As far as I'm concerned the last good man went when Elvis died.
Jennifer Crusie
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Have you talked to North? he said. Yes, she said. I asked him to get us cable. I wish you weren't talking to him. I'd talk to Satan to get cable, Andie said.
Jennifer Crusie