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Of course it hurt you neanderthal! See that? Thats blood. If theres blood, theres pain. Its like smoke and fire.

Jennifer Crusie

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Jennifer Crusie
Age: 75
Born: 1949
Born: September 17
Author
Novelist
Writer
Wapakoneta
Ohio
Pain
Theres
Like
Thats
Smoke
Blood
Hurt
Fire
Courses
Neanderthal
Course
Neanderthals

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Once you know the truth, it's always obvious
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Can we go to work now? Because we're about a minute away from breaking out the ice cream and talking about our feelings, and I don't think we can come back from that.
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Well, you won't unless you come to lunch with me, Cal said. I'm holding it for ransom. There's a gun to its heel right now. I have lunch at my desk, Min began, and thought,Oh, for crying out loud, could I beany more pathetic ? Emilio is experimenting with a lunch menu. He needs you. I need you.
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It's a good thing he broke up with you because now you're free for when the right man finds you. Your prince is on his way. Right. I'm sure he was on his way but a truck hit him.
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If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to be a horrible warning. -Gwen Goodnight
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This is making me crazy. I hate relying on other people to save me, I hate being clingy, I hate it, and every time you show up, I lean on you. - Matilda Scarlet Veronica Betty Vilma Goodnight
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Nobody in my life has ever known me the way you do. Nobody in my life has ever made me feel as good as you do. You know me, you know everything about me, and when you leave me, you're going to be leaving the real me, the me nobody else has ever seen, that's who you're going to be rejecting.
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Feel no guilt. Getting married and giving birth does not mean that you have sold your life away to perfectly healthy people who can get their own damn socks.
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I'm Min's fairy godmother, Charm Boy,' Liza said, frowning down at him. 'And if you don't give her a happily ever after, I'm going to come back and beat you to death with a snow globe.' What happened to bibbity bobbity boo?' Cal asked Min. That was Disney, honey,' Min said. 'It wasn't a documentary.
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His sentences didn't seem to have any verbs, which was par for a politician. All nouns, no action.
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Very few people mate for life with the people they fall for at twelve. Doesn't mean is isn't real, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean it doesn't matter, but basically, we're talking a practice swing in the big game of love.
Jennifer Crusie
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Drink to me! I just realized that I've slept with everyone at this table! ~Nell
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So I know you must have a plan and this wolf— Beast, Min said. —frog, whatever, can't fit your plan. He's not a frog, Min said. I kissed him and he did not turn into a prince.He turned into a god. No, he didn't . Look, I'm never going to see him again, so everybody can relax.
Jennifer Crusie
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As far as I'm concerned the last good man went when Elvis died.
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Broaden your horizons. They're the only ones you'll ever have, so make the suckers as wide as possible.
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What i'm trying to tell you, Min said, is that im going to grow up to be one of those chubby old ladies. It's in my genes. Like self raising flour. i'm going to pouf. thats going to work out well for me, Cal said. because i'm going to grow up to be one of those horny old men who chases chubby old ladies around the couch.
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You know who you remind me of? The kid cop in Lethal Weapon 3. You know, the one who says, 'it's my twenty-first birthday today', and right away you know he's dead meat?
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You got shot at and you still got me an air conditioner.
Jennifer Crusie
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Dead woman are not romantic,' Sophie said flatly. 'Okay, she's not dead,' Phin said. 'The bear ate her, and she came her brains out.
Jennifer Crusie
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A bar would not be a good career move for you.
Jennifer Crusie