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I could shove this swizzle stick through his heart, Min thought. She would'nt do it, of course. The stick was plastic and not nearly pointed enough on the end.

Jennifer Crusie

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Jennifer Crusie
Age: 75
Born: 1949
Born: September 17
Author
Novelist
Writer
Wapakoneta
Ohio
Enough
Plastic
Heart
Stick
Would
Nearly
Sticks
Courses
Course
Ends
Shove
Thought
Pointed

More quotes by Jennifer Crusie

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Part of being a writer is defending your vision and not caving in to outside pressures.
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Real life doesn't have to suck.
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Drink to me! I just realized that I've slept with everyone at this table! ~Nell
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Be sober, be vigilant because your adversary the Devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.
Jennifer Crusie
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Nobody in my life has ever known me the way you do. Nobody in my life has ever made me feel as good as you do. You know me, you know everything about me, and when you leave me, you're going to be leaving the real me, the me nobody else has ever seen, that's who you're going to be rejecting.
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You’ve always been nuts. That’s fine. I can deal with nuts. But lately, you’ve been depressed nuts. I can’t deal with that. - Anthony
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You got shot at and you still got me an air conditioner.
Jennifer Crusie
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Have you talked to North? he said. Yes, she said. I asked him to get us cable. I wish you weren't talking to him. I'd talk to Satan to get cable, Andie said.
Jennifer Crusie
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The measuring and mixing always smoothed out her thinking processes - nothing was as calming as creaming butter - and when the kitchen was warm from the oven overheating and the smell of baking chocolate, she took final stock of where she'd been and where she was going. Everything was fine.
Jennifer Crusie
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I'm Min's fairy godmother, Charm Boy,' Liza said, frowning down at him. 'And if you don't give her a happily ever after, I'm going to come back and beat you to death with a snow globe.' What happened to bibbity bobbity boo?' Cal asked Min. That was Disney, honey,' Min said. 'It wasn't a documentary.
Jennifer Crusie
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As far as I'm concerned the last good man went when Elvis died.
Jennifer Crusie
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Well, you won't unless you come to lunch with me, Cal said. I'm holding it for ransom. There's a gun to its heel right now. I have lunch at my desk, Min began, and thought,Oh, for crying out loud, could I beany more pathetic ? Emilio is experimenting with a lunch menu. He needs you. I need you.
Jennifer Crusie
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Your cat just got cat hair on me.” “It’s only fair,” Min said. “Your suit just got expensive suit lint on him.
Jennifer Crusie
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What i'm trying to tell you, Min said, is that im going to grow up to be one of those chubby old ladies. It's in my genes. Like self raising flour. i'm going to pouf. thats going to work out well for me, Cal said. because i'm going to grow up to be one of those horny old men who chases chubby old ladies around the couch.
Jennifer Crusie
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Where were all the women gamblers? It wasn't as if being a woman wasn't a huge risk all by itself. Twenty-eight percent of female homocide victims were killed by husbands or lovers. Which, come to think of it, was probably why there weren't any women gamblers. Living with men was enough of a gamble.
Jennifer Crusie
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His sentences didn't seem to have any verbs, which was par for a politician. All nouns, no action.
Jennifer Crusie
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Very few people mate for life with the people they fall for at twelve. Doesn't mean is isn't real, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean it doesn't matter, but basically, we're talking a practice swing in the big game of love.
Jennifer Crusie
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Trying to seduce Alec at all was a waste of time he came preseduced anyway. Like a microwave entrée. You pressed his buttons, and he got hot.
Jennifer Crusie
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Feel no guilt. Getting married and giving birth does not mean that you have sold your life away to perfectly healthy people who can get their own damn socks.
Jennifer Crusie
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Phin spared a moment of sympathy for Frank until he looked back and saw him at the bar, leaning into Clea’s cleavage. Get a grip, Frank, he thought, and then he looked down Sophie’s dress and thought, Never mind, Frank.
Jennifer Crusie