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Broaden your horizons. They're the only ones you'll ever have, so make the suckers as wide as possible.

Jennifer Crusie

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Jennifer Crusie
Age: 75
Born: 1949
Born: September 17
Author
Novelist
Writer
Wapakoneta
Ohio
Suckers
Ever
Broaden
Make
Horizons
Sucker
Horizon
Wide
Ones
Possible

More quotes by Jennifer Crusie

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That’s not a father. That’s a sperm donor. Forget him. He’s a mess. Concentrate on me. I’m terrific. (Linc Blaise)
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Nothing but good times ahead.
Jennifer Crusie
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Nobody in my life has ever known me the way you do. Nobody in my life has ever made me feel as good as you do. You know me, you know everything about me, and when you leave me, you're going to be leaving the real me, the me nobody else has ever seen, that's who you're going to be rejecting.
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As far as I'm concerned the last good man went when Elvis died.
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What i'm trying to tell you, Min said, is that im going to grow up to be one of those chubby old ladies. It's in my genes. Like self raising flour. i'm going to pouf. thats going to work out well for me, Cal said. because i'm going to grow up to be one of those horny old men who chases chubby old ladies around the couch.
Jennifer Crusie
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The last time I saw a brow that low I was watching slides in anthropology class
Jennifer Crusie
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Look, I'm not ready for you, Min said. I'm not prepared. I don't have any defenses when you're around. I make these plans and I mean it, I really do, and then I kiss you because I'm crazy about you which would be fine if I didn't fall in love with you but there that is, just standing there, and you know it, you know you've got me.
Jennifer Crusie
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Phin spared a moment of sympathy for Frank until he looked back and saw him at the bar, leaning into Clea’s cleavage. Get a grip, Frank, he thought, and then he looked down Sophie’s dress and thought, Never mind, Frank.
Jennifer Crusie
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have you ever met a woman you wanted to give everything to? just turn over everything you had? -Davy Dempsey-
Jennifer Crusie
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Dead woman are not romantic,' Sophie said flatly. 'Okay, she's not dead,' Phin said. 'The bear ate her, and she came her brains out.
Jennifer Crusie
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Part of being a writer is defending your vision and not caving in to outside pressures.
Jennifer Crusie
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So I know you must have a plan and this wolf— Beast, Min said. —frog, whatever, can't fit your plan. He's not a frog, Min said. I kissed him and he did not turn into a prince.He turned into a god. No, he didn't . Look, I'm never going to see him again, so everybody can relax.
Jennifer Crusie
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I'm Min's fairy godmother, Charm Boy,' Liza said, frowning down at him. 'And if you don't give her a happily ever after, I'm going to come back and beat you to death with a snow globe.' What happened to bibbity bobbity boo?' Cal asked Min. That was Disney, honey,' Min said. 'It wasn't a documentary.
Jennifer Crusie
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Once you know the truth, it's always obvious
Jennifer Crusie
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Real life doesn't have to suck.
Jennifer Crusie
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Your cat just got cat hair on me.” “It’s only fair,” Min said. “Your suit just got expensive suit lint on him.
Jennifer Crusie
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Where were all the women gamblers? It wasn't as if being a woman wasn't a huge risk all by itself. Twenty-eight percent of female homocide victims were killed by husbands or lovers. Which, come to think of it, was probably why there weren't any women gamblers. Living with men was enough of a gamble.
Jennifer Crusie
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she was just…beaming at me, and I thought she’d won the lottery or something, her smile was that big. I asked what happened, and she said…” Park swallowed again. “She said, ‘You’re here.”’ He blinked at Tess. “‘You’re here.’ That’s all it was. That big goofy smile just because I was there. Nobody ever smiled like that at me before.
Jennifer Crusie
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I could shove this swizzle stick through his heart, Min thought. She would'nt do it, of course. The stick was plastic and not nearly pointed enough on the end.
Jennifer Crusie
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Be sober, be vigilant because your adversary the Devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.
Jennifer Crusie