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God, there's teaching biology and teaching sexuality, and it's two separate things. They mix it and make it more of a morality thing where it's like, A man and woman have a baby.

Jen Kirkman

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Jen Kirkman
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: August 28
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Bay State
Things
Separate
Men
Morality
Like
Teaching
Baby
Woman
Two
Thing
Biology
Make
Sexuality

More quotes by Jen Kirkman

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My rule is if one person says it, a thousand people want to say it. That goes for compliments too. I try to balance it out in my head.
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I'll take anyone I can get that will pay money to see me. And if there's more of me in the world, people who think they're good people and comedians who have a good message or whatever, then that's great. If there's some kind of balance there that's good.
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My birthday is in August - right before September, so I have that back to school feeling ingrained in me so that time of year is when I usually do personal goals or resolutions.
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It [sex-ed] was such a slow rollout for me. I just didn't know what the hell was happening.
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I have no choice sometimes, but there's something about being alone. When I'm alone I might not speak for 24 hours, but you're totally seeing things. It's a pretty cool experience.
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I think that, for me, my favorite thing to do is perform standup onstage. Everything else I do is for the exposure to do more stand-up onstage, and for the money, and for the health insurance.
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They asked us to draw pictures of what we thought men and women look like naked and so I was like, Get away, I'm doing my weird homework, drawing a naked man and woman. And I can't even draw. That's all I remember. I have no memory.
Jen Kirkman
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I'm wired to be neurotic and loud and high-strung.
Jen Kirkman
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My curriculum would be the whole year. It would be really slow and it would be about human anatomy. I would teach people about women's bodies so they understand what Planned Parenthood is for.
Jen Kirkman
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I don't like news channels so I have six websites that I check and I get the daily update.
Jen Kirkman
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I have some pretty wonderful friendships, so that's been really good for me. In the past year, I've really worked on that. I think when I was married, I let my friendships go. I think people thought, Oh, because she's married now, she's so happy all the time. But I really was just isolated in my house.
Jen Kirkman
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You teach someone about fallopian tubes in grade school, and you revisit it again in seventh grade for a better understanding of that stuff. I think it's never-ending. I don't know why it isn't all the time.
Jen Kirkman
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I stay on [Twitter] because I deserve to.
Jen Kirkman
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I don't run around feeling infused with positivity, but I'll have to be taking my last breath before I'll admit I'm dying. So I'm either optimistic or in denial.
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I just try to live a moderate life of always checking and trying to be the best person I can be and I'm in therapy and am always working on something.
Jen Kirkman
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Any expectation is what pain is.
Jen Kirkman
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I wonder if that's the difference between fathers and mothers. I'm friends with people who have kids that are like 5 and under, and they're still in that intense mother-bonding phase. It might just be that. Because the dads haven't changed.
Jen Kirkman
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I thought that's what happened to women: You live alone when you're old.
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I'm tired of explaining to Hollywood that people would laugh at me, because I go around America making them laugh every week. Nobody would be offended, nobody would think my leather pants are too controversial.
Jen Kirkman
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I'd also talk about the period and of course all the different gender things that people might feel that they are. I'd be a terrible teacher because of what I don't know about that.
Jen Kirkman