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My birthday is in August - right before September, so I have that back to school feeling ingrained in me so that time of year is when I usually do personal goals or resolutions.
Jen Kirkman
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Jen Kirkman
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: August 28
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Bay State
Year
August
Goal
September
Feelings
Resolution
School
Birthday
Back
Goals
Right
Usually
Years
Personal
Ingrained
Time
Feeling
Resolutions
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Testosterone makes you completely out of control, but that's okay.
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God, there's teaching biology and teaching sexuality, and it's two separate things. They mix it and make it more of a morality thing where it's like, A man and woman have a baby.
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I'm tired of explaining to Hollywood that people would laugh at me, because I go around America making them laugh every week. Nobody would be offended, nobody would think my leather pants are too controversial.
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[Twitter] certainly doesn't hurt me. I'm not in any pain over any of the things I see. I'm just more disappointed.
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I don't like news channels so I have six websites that I check and I get the daily update.
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I'd also talk about the period and of course all the different gender things that people might feel that they are. I'd be a terrible teacher because of what I don't know about that.
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I log out of Twitter on my computer so I have to log in and then I log back out.
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Instead of saving for someone else's college education, I'm currently saving for a luxury retirement community replete with golf carts and handsome young male nurses who love butterscotch.
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They asked us to draw pictures of what we thought men and women look like naked and so I was like, Get away, I'm doing my weird homework, drawing a naked man and woman. And I can't even draw. That's all I remember. I have no memory.
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You never know anymore if you'll see something you don't want to see, if you're jealous of something, if you're going through a breakup and you see something, so I just don't even look at those things any more [ in Instagram].
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I realized I need a certain kind of chemistry and a certain kind of look to be into someone, and like 1 percent of the population has it.
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I think that, for me, my favorite thing to do is perform standup onstage. Everything else I do is for the exposure to do more stand-up onstage, and for the money, and for the health insurance.
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I wonder if that's the difference between fathers and mothers. I'm friends with people who have kids that are like 5 and under, and they're still in that intense mother-bonding phase. It might just be that. Because the dads haven't changed.
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A lot of times that I'm single is not for a lack of anyone being interested it's me.
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At first, there was a separation of clubs and sketch comedy. Now there's all kinds of comedy, making us one big happy family.
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What I found out about myself was I am not someone who doesn't believe in marriage.
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