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Now I know what it is like to feel like a total idiot.

Jeff Lindsay

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Jeff Lindsay
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: July 14
Novelist
Playwright
Writer
Miami
Florida
Jeffry P. Freundlich
Jeffry P. Lindsay
Idiot
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More quotes by Jeff Lindsay

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And here I always thought morality was useless.
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This was just no fun. I wanted my brain back.
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I am unlovable...I have tried to involve myself in other people, in relationships, and even - in my sillier moments - in love. But it doesn't work. Something in me is broken or missing and sooner or later the other person catches me Acting or one of Those Nights comes along.
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Really now: If you can't get me my newspaper on time, how can you expect me to refrain from killing people?
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I know family comes first, but shouldn't that mean after breakfast?
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I don't know if you have noticed this, but it is quite possible for two human beings to have a conversation in which one or both parties involved has absolutely no idea what they're talking about.
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Our universe is ruled by random whim, inhabited by people who laugh at logic.
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been there done that, bought the t-shirt Chapter 2
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Mutilated corpses with a chance of afternoon showers. I got dressed and went to work.
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No big deal. We all have blood in us, the trick is keeping it inside.
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Dying makes everyone weaker, subject to painful insight, and not always insight into any kind of special truth - it's just the approaching end that makes people want to believe they are seeing something in the line of a great revelation.
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And then more quiet, silence so deep it almost drowned out the roar of the night music that pounded away in my secret self.
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Or was he saying, Hi! Wanna play? And I did. Of course I did.
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I rose to my knees, mouth dry and heart pounding, and paused to finger a rip in my beautiful Dacron bowling shirt. I pushed my fingertip through the hole and wiggled it at myself. Hello, Dexter, where are you going? Hello, Mr. Finger. I don't know, but I'm almost there. I hear my friends calling.
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After a long moment I closed the freezer door. I wanted to lie down and press my cheek against the cool linoleum. Instead I reached out with my little finger and flipped the Barbie's head. It went thack thack against the door. I flipped it again. Thack thack. Whee. I had a new hobby.
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And so as much as I can, I care about her, dear Deborah. It's probably not love, but I would rather she were happy.
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Rectory always sounded to me like a place where you would find a proctologist.
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First things first has always been my motto, mostly because it makes absolutely no sense - after all, if first things were second or third, they wouldn't be first things, would they? Still, cliches exist to comfort the feeble minded, not to provide any actual meaning.
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Money to me had always been merely something the sheep used to show each other how wonderful they were.
Jeff Lindsay
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It was such an unexpected and genuine smile that if I only had a soul I'm sure I would have felt quite guilty.
Jeff Lindsay