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The mind picks some very bad times to take a walk doesn't it?

Jeff Lindsay

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Jeff Lindsay
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: July 14
Novelist
Playwright
Writer
Miami
Florida
Jeffry P. Freundlich
Jeffry P. Lindsay
Mind
Picks
Walk
Walks
Times
Doesn
Take

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Could this be the Apocalypse ?
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Perhaps because I'll never be one, humans are interesting to me.
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And then more quiet, silence so deep it almost drowned out the roar of the night music that pounded away in my secret self.
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For the first time I could remember, I felt weak, woozy and stupid— like a human-being. Like a very small and helpless human-being.
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But as I have noticed on more than one occaision, life itself is unfair, and there is no complaint department, so we might as well accept things the way they happen, clean up the mess, and move on.
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I know family comes first, but shouldn't that mean after breakfast?
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I am unlovable...I have tried to involve myself in other people, in relationships, and even - in my sillier moments - in love. But it doesn't work. Something in me is broken or missing and sooner or later the other person catches me Acting or one of Those Nights comes along.
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They like to tell us that it is important to speak the truth, but it has been my experience that real happiness lies in having people tell you what you want to believe, usually not the same thing at all, and if you have to stub your toe on the truth later, so be it.
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But what could I do? Be stupid for a while? I wasn't sure I knew how, even after so many years of careful observation.
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A man can take only so much. Even a phony man like me.
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The key to a happy life is to have accomplishments to be proud of and purpose to look forward to, and at the moment I had both. How wonderful it was to be me.
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For my part, my interest in Paris had faded away completely long ago when I learned that it was in France.
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It really is better to be lucky than to be good.
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What to wear? I could think of no guidelines on what we were wearing this season to a party forced on you to celebrate an unwanted engagement that might turn into a violent confrontation with a vengeful maniac. Clearly brown shoes were out, but beyond that nothing really seemed de rigueur.
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When faced with people who have very limited conversational skills and no apparent desire to cultivate any it's always easier to simply go along.
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And as we should all know by now, anytime you predict failure you have an excellent chance of being right.
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Anybody can be charming if they don't mind faking it, saying all the stupid, obvious, nauseating things that a conscience keeps most people from saying. Happily, I don't have a conscience. I say them.
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It was such an unexpected and genuine smile that if I only had a soul I'm sure I would have felt quite guilty.
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After a long moment I closed the freezer door. I wanted to lie down and press my cheek against the cool linoleum. Instead I reached out with my little finger and flipped the Barbie's head. It went thack thack against the door. I flipped it again. Thack thack. Whee. I had a new hobby.
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I thought about the nice clothes that I always wore. Well of course I did. I took pride in being the best dressed monster in Dade County.
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