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Really now: If you can't get me my newspaper on time, how can you expect me to refrain from killing people?

Jeff Lindsay

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Jeff Lindsay
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: July 14
Novelist
Playwright
Writer
Miami
Florida
Jeffry P. Freundlich
Jeffry P. Lindsay
Newspaper
Newspapers
Killing
Expect
Really
Time
People
Refrain

More quotes by Jeff Lindsay

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Our universe is ruled by random whim, inhabited by people who laugh at logic.
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Perhaps because I'll never be one, humans are interesting to me.
Jeff Lindsay
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And once again I found myself wondering, as I drifted off to stunned and unbelieving sleep:How do these terrible things always happen to me?
Jeff Lindsay
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I'm quite sure more people fake an awful lot of everyday human contact. I just fake all of it. --Dexter
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I thought about the nice clothes that I always wore. Well of course I did. I took pride in being the best dressed monster in Dade County.
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What to wear? I could think of no guidelines on what we were wearing this season to a party forced on you to celebrate an unwanted engagement that might turn into a violent confrontation with a vengeful maniac. Clearly brown shoes were out, but beyond that nothing really seemed de rigueur.
Jeff Lindsay
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...my conscience has the same hard reality as a unicorn.
Jeff Lindsay
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But as I have noticed on more than one occaision, life itself is unfair, and there is no complaint department, so we might as well accept things the way they happen, clean up the mess, and move on.
Jeff Lindsay
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No big deal. We all have blood in us, the trick is keeping it inside.
Jeff Lindsay
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been there done that, bought the t-shirt Chapter 2
Jeff Lindsay
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For my part, my interest in Paris had faded away completely long ago when I learned that it was in France.
Jeff Lindsay
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It happens incompetence is rewarded more often than not.
Jeff Lindsay
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This was just no fun. I wanted my brain back.
Jeff Lindsay
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I sighed as comforting as it may be to some of us, sarcasm, like youth, is wasted on the young.
Jeff Lindsay
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What a terrible thing life can be.
Jeff Lindsay
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I waved to everybody. Some of them even waved back. They knew me, had seen me go by before, always cheerful, a big hello for everybody. He was such a nice man. Very friendly. I can’t believe he did those horrible things . . .
Jeff Lindsay
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They like to tell us that it is important to speak the truth, but it has been my experience that real happiness lies in having people tell you what you want to believe, usually not the same thing at all, and if you have to stub your toe on the truth later, so be it.
Jeff Lindsay
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I really am guilty, of many somethings, all of them lethal and very enjoyable and technically not quite legal.
Jeff Lindsay
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What do you want a clock for?” “To find out what time it is,” I said. “I think that’s the usual purpose.
Jeff Lindsay
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And so as much as I can, I care about her, dear Deborah. It's probably not love, but I would rather she were happy.
Jeff Lindsay