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I know family comes first, but shouldn't that mean after breakfast?
Jeff Lindsay
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Jeff Lindsay
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: July 14
Novelist
Playwright
Writer
Miami
Florida
Jeffry P. Freundlich
Jeffry P. Lindsay
Breakfast
Shouldn
Family
Comes
Firsts
First
Mean
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I sighed as comforting as it may be to some of us, sarcasm, like youth, is wasted on the young.
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I nodded with genuine synthetic sympathy.
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They like to tell us that it is important to speak the truth, but it has been my experience that real happiness lies in having people tell you what you want to believe, usually not the same thing at all, and if you have to stub your toe on the truth later, so be it.
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I thought about the nice clothes that I always wore. Well of course I did. I took pride in being the best dressed monster in Dade County.
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But as I have noticed on more than one occaision, life itself is unfair, and there is no complaint department, so we might as well accept things the way they happen, clean up the mess, and move on.
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I had killed our careful relationship by driving my tongue through its heart and pushing it off a cliff.
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After a long moment I closed the freezer door. I wanted to lie down and press my cheek against the cool linoleum. Instead I reached out with my little finger and flipped the Barbie's head. It went thack thack against the door. I flipped it again. Thack thack. Whee. I had a new hobby.
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Or was he saying, Hi! Wanna play? And I did. Of course I did.
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What to wear? I could think of no guidelines on what we were wearing this season to a party forced on you to celebrate an unwanted engagement that might turn into a violent confrontation with a vengeful maniac. Clearly brown shoes were out, but beyond that nothing really seemed de rigueur.
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I don't know if you have noticed this, but it is quite possible for two human beings to have a conversation in which one or both parties involved has absolutely no idea what they're talking about.
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She really did like me, the idiot.
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And once again I found myself wondering, as I drifted off to stunned and unbelieving sleep:How do these terrible things always happen to me?
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Our universe is ruled by random whim, inhabited by people who laugh at logic.
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I'm a very neat monster.
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It really is better to be lucky than to be good.
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And so as much as I can, I care about her, dear Deborah. It's probably not love, but I would rather she were happy.
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Perhaps because I'll never be one, humans are interesting to me.
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I looked around the store and what I saw was not very encouraging. There were rows and rows of violent toys...aisle after aisle of training devices for recreational slaughter. No wonder our world was such a mean and violent place...if we teach children that killing is fun, can we really be surprised if now and then someone is smart enough to learn?
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