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If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
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Film Producer
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Atlanta
Georgia
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More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right
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When I was a kid, my parents had a 900-pound television on top of a TV tray. My dad's theory was, 'Let him pull it over his head a few times, he'll learn.'
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You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.
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You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.
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You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
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You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.
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If your stomach blocks your view of your feet, cover it up! The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are people who don't have bellies. Now those little baby spare tires are kinda cute tractor tires aren't! Especially if they've got hair on them!
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If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.
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Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather.
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Kids aren't suppose to have cancer, they're suppose to have a future.
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You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
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You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.
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You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
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I've got nothing against tattoos. I don't have one myself. If I did, it would be right there next to my watch. It would say Your wife's birthday is August 2nd, your anniversary is September 18th, don't let Ron White drive your car again.
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We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.
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You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
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People are like, Hey, Jeff, lemme tell you... I'm like, Hold on, let me get a pen and a piece of paper.
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