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Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
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Criminals
House
Grass
Engine
Kind
Gun
Chain
Dog
Engines
Tree
Hanging
Feet
Tall
Break
Foot
Morning
Chains
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
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As a comic, you learn to use your voice because you don't have the benefit of visual things.
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My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.
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You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
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You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.
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You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
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You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.
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We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.
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When I was a kid, my parents had a 900-pound television on top of a TV tray. My dad's theory was, 'Let him pull it over his head a few times, he'll learn.'
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Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges he got guys off the fishing docks.
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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.
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You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.
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Louisiana has the best food on the planet if you don't really ask too much about what you're eating.
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I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
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Country music is about new love and it's about old love.
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