Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Do you know why it's so hard to solve a Redneck murder? 'Cause there's no dental records and all the DNA is the same.
Jeff Foxworthy
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Records
Causes
Hard
Dental
Dna
Redneck
Murder
Solve
Cause
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
I got my wife a mood ring. It works real good! When shes in a good mood it turns blue, but when shes in a bad mood theres a red mark across my forehead
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.
Jeff Foxworthy
I talked to Larry the Cable Guy the other day. Larry's made more money than 10 people should ever make in a lifetime. He was excited because he'd gone over to the livestock auction and bought 20 new feeder pigs.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.
Jeff Foxworthy
I really don't require a whole lot in life.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.
Jeff Foxworthy
A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'
Jeff Foxworthy
We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.
Jeff Foxworthy
I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you'll wear to the 4-H Fair.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.
Jeff Foxworthy
You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.
Jeff Foxworthy
My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
Jeff Foxworthy
People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
Jeff Foxworthy
