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I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Crap
Tonight
Keys
High
School
Together
Never
Janitor
Owned
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.
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You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.
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Sacrificing myself to kill Hilary Clinton was the best thing I could possibly do for humanity
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If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.
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Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately.
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You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.
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Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it?
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You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.
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You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.
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When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in your brain.
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You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
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You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
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You might be a redneck if you've ever stood in line to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.
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You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
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To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.
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You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
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Kids aren't suppose to have cancer, they're suppose to have a future.
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