Quote

I've got nothing against tattoos. I don't have one myself. If I did, it would be right there next to my watch. It would say Your wife's birthday is August 2nd, your anniversary is September 18th, don't let Ron White drive your car again.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Watch
Anniversary
Wife
August
White
Tattoo
Next
September
Nothing
Birthday
Right
Drive
Would
Car
Watches
Tattoos

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.
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You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it?
Jeff Foxworthy
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People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.
Jeff Foxworthy
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When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in your brain.
Jeff Foxworthy
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If your stomach blocks your view of your feet, cover it up! The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are people who don't have bellies. Now those little baby spare tires are kinda cute tractor tires aren't! Especially if they've got hair on them!
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you've ever stood in line to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
Jeff Foxworthy
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The biggest thing I've learned is to listen to my own gut. I have learned to trust my instincts.
Jeff Foxworthy