Quote

I've got nothing against tattoos. I don't have one myself. If I did, it would be right there next to my watch. It would say Your wife's birthday is August 2nd, your anniversary is September 18th, don't let Ron White drive your car again.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Wife
August
White
Tattoo
Next
September
Nothing
Birthday
Right
Drive
Would
Car
Watches
Tattoos
Watch
Anniversary

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.
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You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if there is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.
Jeff Foxworthy
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My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.
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You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.
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You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink.
Jeff Foxworthy
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I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
Jeff Foxworthy
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If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if...you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.
Jeff Foxworthy
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I think with a comedian, when you get to the point of a greatest hits, it's kind of an acknowledgment that you've been doing stand-up a long time, which not very many people do.
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I talked to Larry the Cable Guy the other day. Larry's made more money than 10 people should ever make in a lifetime. He was excited because he'd gone over to the livestock auction and bought 20 new feeder pigs.
Jeff Foxworthy