Quote

If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
White
Look
Looks
Like
Toyota
Juicy
Thighs
Hood
Aren

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
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I think with a comedian, when you get to the point of a greatest hits, it's kind of an acknowledgment that you've been doing stand-up a long time, which not very many people do.
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You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day.
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You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.
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Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
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Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges he got guys off the fishing docks.
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You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.
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You might be a redneck if...you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.
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You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.
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If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck.
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If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
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If your stomach blocks your view of your feet, cover it up! The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are people who don't have bellies. Now those little baby spare tires are kinda cute tractor tires aren't! Especially if they've got hair on them!
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You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.
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I don't necessarily think of it as Southern comedy. I just think I'm a comedian and I have a Southern accent.
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The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up... until the day you got the security deposit back. You're arguing with the landlord... 'No sir, the back door was missing when we moved in here! The pizzas were always on the ceiling!'
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You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
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You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right
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