Quote

You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.

Jeff Foxworthy

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Include
Road
Turn
Turns
House
Might
Paved
Redneck
Directions

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

Image
You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or How Y'all Doin'?
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
If men have a smell it's usually an accident.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
I really don't require a whole lot in life.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
Louisiana has the best food on the planet if you don't really ask too much about what you're eating.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up... until the day you got the security deposit back. You're arguing with the landlord... 'No sir, the back door was missing when we moved in here! The pizzas were always on the ceiling!'
Jeff Foxworthy
Image
You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.
Jeff Foxworthy