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You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
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Screenwriter
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Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
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More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
[about sex and being married] It's like being the National Guard, we may not be seeing as much action as the front line, but we are living to fight another day.
Jeff Foxworthy
You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.
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You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.
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If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
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It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.
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You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.
Jeff Foxworthy
If you can't remember the last time you had sex with a woman, you're either gay, or married.
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You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats.
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There's no down time any more.
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
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If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
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You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.
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Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately.
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You don't get married to get sex. Getting married to get sex is like buying a 747 to get free peanuts.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
Jeff Foxworthy
